I am Yours

Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were, but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today

Life takes its moments to present its ironies and slap you. Those closest to me know my past between my Dad and me. We have catastrophies that have lead to great riffs. At times, I truly claim that they are my cause. I was obstinant, strong-willed and down right , obscene. I challenged, I was destructive, I was disrespectful, and I was cruel. I followed the leader. Its all I knew. Its not enough justification.I Am Yours.


Ooh, ooh
I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again

I took all that you dished out and returned it with just as much passion. You fumbled your way through fatherhood just as I do now. You showed loved as you were taught. I fumbled my way of learning your way and swore that I would break the cycle. You broke it for me. I now follow your lead.......as you now see what could have been. You stepped forward, and I see it, I welcome it, I have been waiting patiently for it. I am so proud to be a part of it. I am so happy to share it with you.


I am Yours.

Sometimes I wanna call ya
But I know you won't be there
Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

You gave me a gift I can never repay. You called me your own. You gave me your name. You gave me a family that I hold so dear. You loved when it was needed....you cared when it meant the most....and always tried to do the best....but never were able to express it in terms this boy....now a man...could understand then, but does now.

I am Yours.


Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just wanna hide 'cause it's you I miss
And it's so hard to say goodbye
When it comes to this, oooh yeah


So many times I have screamed you will die a lonely old man, so may times I screamed you are a bastard, so many times I have screamed that you care about nothing but yourself.....so many time I have been blind. So many times....I have been wrong. So many times I never looked, or at times, wanted to...... I never tried. I only looked at me and never really tried to look....I am looking now and what I see holds me humbled. Thank you. Truly......


I am Yours.


Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes
And see you looking back

We both squandered chances to know each other, we both stubbornly refused to move. We both faced off in anger and jealousy and also in love and in experiences. The one thing we never did was respect each other....until now....one needed to see something from the other....not sure who flinched first....the hope we had in each other is fulfilling.


I am Yours.


Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself, ohh


To listen to your excitement as to how my life is moving forward is a great moment. It is strange to me. You never took to much interest in my youth, as I felt it. You never seemed excited but then that is not a reason to hold a grudge on my end. The Woman you married and her Father gave me something that could help build a bridge to each other for us. The woman who gave to birth to you was very instrumental in building me as well. Your father was your father, he was something else to me. He loved you, and on his deathbed, he told me to mend our riff....he knew his place, he knew his cause, but he knew you loved me....he knew his deeds were wrong but he knew his son...and didn't want you to repeat his mistakes with me...you didn't...He had a really hard time excepting me as his grandson....he apologized to me at that time, but I never understood why he was apologizing to me...until that day you both told me the truth....he didn't want you to have to do that too....I never want to have you say your sorry. Ever....


I am Yours.


If I had just one more day
I would tell you how much that I've missed you
Since you've been away
Ooh, it's dangerous
It's so out of line
To try and turn back time

As our lives move forward, I want you to know that time is not infinite. We both have limited time ahead.....we both wasted so much time with pride, with arrogance, with immaturity on both side. I never want to wasted that time again. It was easier to ignore and fight than to come together....even you know that....one person's will is not the best answer for the other.
It never will be.

I am Yours.


I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

I am so thankful for the time we have now. I know that we will not always agree, and it will get heated. That is the parent/child relationship...but I am counting on this new found respect we have forged. It is astounding and reinvigorarted me with so much hope. You are overbearing but I am overresponsive. Its the irresistable force that meets the immovable object. Which one is which is the question. No matter what has ever been said or done...I always Loved you....and still do.

I am Yours.

Always have been, always will be.

I love you Dad!

Sincerely,

Son