Saturday, September 24, 2011
Revisiting,Remembering, and Struggling With the Voice
I have transferred all my blog post from Myspace here (which IS LONG OVERDUE!!!) and it is uplifting again to reread my thoughts again...I have been struggling with my writing over the years...I LOVE TO WRITE!! To Expound on thought...I do it with out fear or favor....I do it with honor....It is me..but the Blockage has been lengthy, to my own detriment...but I work through it...I accept it...I am strong, I am confident....but I have lacked inspiration....which has been overtaken by distraction, by obligation, and I miss my Muse again....When Life gets in the way...You do what you have to do...and regret nothing...but it is perfectly safe to miss what you love and want...I am remembering, and patiently waiting to write again...The fire is there..only waiting for the ember to meet my wind...and the blaze will light again...Patience Chris....Patience...My voice is not silent....it is only being patient..
YES!!! Some of Us READ YOUR ENTIRE PAGE!!!!
This wrttien on Myspace on Sept. 27th, 2006
Current mood:curious
I must be an oddity here.....although I think I would prefer the word "unique". Now before you decide to saddle me with the label "arrogant", please hear me out. Unique means "one of a kind" and we all are that, aren't we? If you weren't, then don't you think you might want to have that much needed discussion with your parents about the "big secret" they've been hiding from you ALL THESE YEARS! but I digress....
My tie in here is that I DO READ EVERYTHING in your page! I joined this site to meet great and interesting people. Don't get me wrong, the pics you post are the initial attraction, but beauty is fleeting at best. I am as real as the ocean meets the beach, I am as real as the sun rises and sets, and I am looking to glimpse your character, your personality, and to see if you are more than a pretty picture. I can already tell that your beautiful, but do you have the complete package? I mean, I understand you can't tell specific details of a person's complete nature from one web page but we can get a good picture of it in the way you write, the way you smile, and the ways your eyes look. I'm a big believer in seeing into your eyes. I truly believe you really can see a person for who they are that way. I promise you I will look you in the eyes when I'm speaking to you, I can and do this with everyone. I don't see those things just because your wearing a bikini or posing half naked. If I were truly interested in only seeing your breasts or pics of you naked, I assure you, I am more than honest and bold enough to send you an e-mail stating what I want! The body is a beautiful thing, and I celebrate it as such, but please understand that it has to carry a soul in it and as for me I want to see that most. That is me and I am very comfortable in being that way. Being blinded by someone's beauty can be as dangerous to your soul as trying to kiss a cobra is to your health! I really have no problem with the pictures and yes, they are really alluring, so please don't think I'm a prude by any means. Just gotta be more to someone than a good body and a pretty face, don't you think? To some of you, I'm sure I may sound a bit condescending but in all fairness, I have carried the title "The Devil's Little Angel" for part of my life at times too! Just keep in mind if you choose to show yourself off, I understand it and welcome it but don't stereotype me for looking! You put it out there for people to notice and to look at!! LMAO!!!!
Character, Integrity, Honor, are most important because your looks are going to diminish somewhat as time goes by. So when that happens and you don't have those things then I guess you don't have much to offer after all. Now I've been complimented on my looks some in my life, and to those who have given it sincerely, I thank you so much! It is not something I will ever take for granted. Too those who have shared their inner looks with me I will remember you most of all. I think you are beautiful too!
So please, I ask so many of you sincerely, be that beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside. I AM READING YOUR STORY and I invite you to read mine! Tell me what you think, good, bad or indifferent. At least I know you are alive and doing well! (I know, be careful what you wish for, you just might get it!) I would like to meet the person behind those eyes and in that body.Remember this Robert Palmer lyric- "A pretty face, don't make no pretty heart"
If I invite you to join me as a friend it is because I saw something in you that made me want to get to know you. If getting to know dogs is your thing, then by all means, don't let me stop you! I assure you I am not registered with the AKC. It's simple, clean and easy! No fuss, no mess! If you want to meet a good man then here I sit. I'll let you decide if you see that in me and if you do, then please say hi, and join me in friendship or possible romance and let other things go where they go. For those of you who ask me to join you, I assure you that I will certainly extend the same kind of courtesy as I would anyone I seek! Until we meet and talk!
Show me your heart and I'll share with you mine! I know of no other way.
Current mood:curious
I must be an oddity here.....although I think I would prefer the word "unique". Now before you decide to saddle me with the label "arrogant", please hear me out. Unique means "one of a kind" and we all are that, aren't we? If you weren't, then don't you think you might want to have that much needed discussion with your parents about the "big secret" they've been hiding from you ALL THESE YEARS! but I digress....
My tie in here is that I DO READ EVERYTHING in your page! I joined this site to meet great and interesting people. Don't get me wrong, the pics you post are the initial attraction, but beauty is fleeting at best. I am as real as the ocean meets the beach, I am as real as the sun rises and sets, and I am looking to glimpse your character, your personality, and to see if you are more than a pretty picture. I can already tell that your beautiful, but do you have the complete package? I mean, I understand you can't tell specific details of a person's complete nature from one web page but we can get a good picture of it in the way you write, the way you smile, and the ways your eyes look. I'm a big believer in seeing into your eyes. I truly believe you really can see a person for who they are that way. I promise you I will look you in the eyes when I'm speaking to you, I can and do this with everyone. I don't see those things just because your wearing a bikini or posing half naked. If I were truly interested in only seeing your breasts or pics of you naked, I assure you, I am more than honest and bold enough to send you an e-mail stating what I want! The body is a beautiful thing, and I celebrate it as such, but please understand that it has to carry a soul in it and as for me I want to see that most. That is me and I am very comfortable in being that way. Being blinded by someone's beauty can be as dangerous to your soul as trying to kiss a cobra is to your health! I really have no problem with the pictures and yes, they are really alluring, so please don't think I'm a prude by any means. Just gotta be more to someone than a good body and a pretty face, don't you think? To some of you, I'm sure I may sound a bit condescending but in all fairness, I have carried the title "The Devil's Little Angel" for part of my life at times too! Just keep in mind if you choose to show yourself off, I understand it and welcome it but don't stereotype me for looking! You put it out there for people to notice and to look at!! LMAO!!!!
Character, Integrity, Honor, are most important because your looks are going to diminish somewhat as time goes by. So when that happens and you don't have those things then I guess you don't have much to offer after all. Now I've been complimented on my looks some in my life, and to those who have given it sincerely, I thank you so much! It is not something I will ever take for granted. Too those who have shared their inner looks with me I will remember you most of all. I think you are beautiful too!
So please, I ask so many of you sincerely, be that beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside. I AM READING YOUR STORY and I invite you to read mine! Tell me what you think, good, bad or indifferent. At least I know you are alive and doing well! (I know, be careful what you wish for, you just might get it!) I would like to meet the person behind those eyes and in that body.Remember this Robert Palmer lyric- "A pretty face, don't make no pretty heart"
If I invite you to join me as a friend it is because I saw something in you that made me want to get to know you. If getting to know dogs is your thing, then by all means, don't let me stop you! I assure you I am not registered with the AKC. It's simple, clean and easy! No fuss, no mess! If you want to meet a good man then here I sit. I'll let you decide if you see that in me and if you do, then please say hi, and join me in friendship or possible romance and let other things go where they go. For those of you who ask me to join you, I assure you that I will certainly extend the same kind of courtesy as I would anyone I seek! Until we meet and talk!
Show me your heart and I'll share with you mine! I know of no other way.
So Much Intelligence, So Little Use Of It!!!
Current mood:surprised
""Never make someone a priority if they only make you an option"
I am so impressed with all the really intelligent and great people I see on social sites and dating website mediums! I "browse" alot on myspace, facebook, (and now: Google+) and also look through dating sites, and as I was reading many pages, I ran across the above little gem years ago. I couldn't help but think just how powerful and profound it is. I was dumbstruck (now some might say that it wouldn't take much to do that, but I'll let you decide that for yourself after you talk to me..LOL) as to what that meant in my life.
In my deepest relationship, that is exactly what I let myself become. Oh I tried to change it by all means, but I realize that that was exactly what she relegated me to, an option. After 6 years together, I was now just an option. Quite the bitter pill to swallow, you know, but I did. Now the relationship has been over for a long time and I have moved on, but have you ever read something, heard a song, smelled something, cleaned out a drawer and found a card or pic and the memories come floating back to you. It has had to happen to you or you have never loved anyone.
I know that I am more than an option. I will not ever make someone a priority until they want to make me one as well. If they will not make respect, honor, and integrity a priority in their life then why would I ever have the faith in them to share it together. Absolutely nothing wrong with having these expectations met. I am selective in whom I will call a "friend". I will be as good a friend as I can be and that will also be shown here on this site. I select those whom I feel are interesting and real, and I expect nothing less about myself from anyone here either. I'm not here to gather as many scantily clad "friends" as possible like some. If a spark ingnites a flame between us then that is wonderful, but friendships are the basis. Do I want them to attractive? Yes, (and that can be meant in many different ways, by the way) but I want a good soul and intellect to go with that, please?! Can you talk into the speaker please!
No one expects "undying devotion and love" after a few dates,(IF they do: RUN FORREST! RUNNNNN!) but just re-read that statement at the beginning and try and apply it for a minute to those of your present....did you or they ever do this and did you learn not to?
""Never make someone a priority if they only make you an option"
I am so impressed with all the really intelligent and great people I see on social sites and dating website mediums! I "browse" alot on myspace, facebook, (and now: Google+) and also look through dating sites, and as I was reading many pages, I ran across the above little gem years ago. I couldn't help but think just how powerful and profound it is. I was dumbstruck (now some might say that it wouldn't take much to do that, but I'll let you decide that for yourself after you talk to me..LOL) as to what that meant in my life.
In my deepest relationship, that is exactly what I let myself become. Oh I tried to change it by all means, but I realize that that was exactly what she relegated me to, an option. After 6 years together, I was now just an option. Quite the bitter pill to swallow, you know, but I did. Now the relationship has been over for a long time and I have moved on, but have you ever read something, heard a song, smelled something, cleaned out a drawer and found a card or pic and the memories come floating back to you. It has had to happen to you or you have never loved anyone.
I know that I am more than an option. I will not ever make someone a priority until they want to make me one as well. If they will not make respect, honor, and integrity a priority in their life then why would I ever have the faith in them to share it together. Absolutely nothing wrong with having these expectations met. I am selective in whom I will call a "friend". I will be as good a friend as I can be and that will also be shown here on this site. I select those whom I feel are interesting and real, and I expect nothing less about myself from anyone here either. I'm not here to gather as many scantily clad "friends" as possible like some. If a spark ingnites a flame between us then that is wonderful, but friendships are the basis. Do I want them to attractive? Yes, (and that can be meant in many different ways, by the way) but I want a good soul and intellect to go with that, please?! Can you talk into the speaker please!
No one expects "undying devotion and love" after a few dates,(IF they do: RUN FORREST! RUNNNNN!) but just re-read that statement at the beginning and try and apply it for a minute to those of your present....did you or they ever do this and did you learn not to?
Treading Down that Same Road
Current mood:amused
When I was a active subsciber of MySpace, This one of my first Blogs...I felt the need to speak openly through the medium...as I have always have in life:
As I read alot of the pages, I notice everyone has a list. A list for who they want to meet, a list for who they will allow to contact them, A list for how to be contacted, and on and on.
Now I am a respectful person and am more than willing to oblige you after I read your page and see who you are, so to speak. So as I was doing that I thought "why don't you post a list of your own to let people know what you are about on meeting new people too". So let's tread down that road....come join me won't you?
LIST OF PEOPLE I WILL DENY IMMEDIATELY! NO EXCEPTIONS!:
1. Professional Web Camers!: Don't bother with the invitation. I don't like the big tease in person, much less over a web cam. Its just not a close substitute for live and in person and never will be! BORING! My imagination can do far more than anything you can do on a webcam.(I have a personal rule, if she is going to put her sexual body parts that close to my face in order to arouse and excite me, she better be more than sure she is willing and able to use them for the purpose she intends or I'll walk!) Enough said!
2. People who use EXCESSIVE profanity: It might be great and exciting to lower your vocabulary to your friends, but some of us find it really obnoxious. You kiss your kids with that mouth? and would you put something in your mouth that you wouldn't hold in your hands?
3. Princesses need not apply: Yes, I'm talking to all the gold diggers, primp princesses, and wanna be queens. High maintenance is only achieved if you can prove you are really worth it. If all you are is a good body, a pretty smile, and a rabid narcissist; you are not that great! I support you for believing in yourself , you should and I applaud it, but not at others expense. Its great to be beautiful, but just because you breathe and recieve attention doesn't make you worthy of everything you want and see. You get what you give......
4. Angry People: Ok, I understand you've been dumped, cheated on, lied to, used, manipulated, swindled, and in some cases, even beaten. You did not deserve that. I was not there, I did none of those things and I will not be compared to others who have done this. I am no angel, not in the least, but I do show respect and courtesy and I expect the same of you. Would it be fair for me to compare you to the women who have hurt me deeply? Would you be offended if I did? Look, I understand that it hurt, I really do. Break the chain, stop the cycle, use what ever cliche' you like, but stop thinking you are the only one who has ever been down that road. Seek out those who have been where you just came from and talk to them, find common ground, Really LISTEN to them and start seeing people for who they are, not for whom you anxiously suspect they will become. It is your choice, I concur, but if you took the time to read my page, you will remember what I said about limiting yourself, you aren't limiting others as you think you are. You will know when you have met a horn dog or not, you've been alive and survived the dating scene for a while haven't you?
( Note: to those who are hurting right now, stop what you are doing and realize you need to heal. Do you really think you'll be able to control those emotions with a new person? or do you think you can make the new person live up to the things you didn't get in the last relationship? Most healthy people will see the damage and let you go before you ever get the chance to suck the life out of them. Think about it for a minute, just because we get hurt doesn't mean the rest of the world owes us anything, not even an apology. The only person who does is the one who hurt us and good luck in trying to get that sincerely. Give it time, don't mess someone else up because someone tore your emotions apart, time does heal, I promise!)
5. Dominatrix types: Look ladies, you serve a purpose in this world, just not my world. I will not serve you. I hate domination and dominating others. A little playfulness is great but if you come at me with a whip and chain, I will defend myself, no matter what the gender. Good luck with that though and enjoy yourself, Mistress! (once and only time I'll ever call you that)
6. People who ask me to send a pic of my genitals: Look ladies, I understand the law of equality. I have no doubt you get 100's of requests a day to send pics of you naked, pics of your breasts, pics of the "bearded clam", but rest assured I will not request them from you. I, of course, will look if you volunteer to show me. Understand, that if you do volunteer, you did so of your own free will. I am a red blooded male, for the love of all things great, but I will not ask you for them and please don't ask me to do the same. That request is a location specific event and I don't do that with just anyone.
7. Any one under the age of 25: Unless you are a friend of my children, or a growing or grown up child of one of my friends, what would we have to talk about? I'm 37, not 17. As you can see in my "Friends" list, my daughter is listed as 1, she is the only one I will allow to do this. I don't care about whats on MTV, what the latest and greatest new fad is, and reality T.V is getting really old! Plus, being accused of Pedophelia is not something I even want to approach or think about! I live in the REAL WORLD, I don't watch it on T.V. I do like some of the music, I do like to dance, but come on young people! I am a father, but not your father. Lets keep it that way ok. Sorry but thats how I feel.
Ok...that is about the gist of it. I'm sure as I look around further I will find more things to add but so far that is what I have dealt with. So if you fit this list, use a little rational thinking and don't tread down that road! Thanks!
When I was a active subsciber of MySpace, This one of my first Blogs...I felt the need to speak openly through the medium...as I have always have in life:
As I read alot of the pages, I notice everyone has a list. A list for who they want to meet, a list for who they will allow to contact them, A list for how to be contacted, and on and on.
Now I am a respectful person and am more than willing to oblige you after I read your page and see who you are, so to speak. So as I was doing that I thought "why don't you post a list of your own to let people know what you are about on meeting new people too". So let's tread down that road....come join me won't you?
LIST OF PEOPLE I WILL DENY IMMEDIATELY! NO EXCEPTIONS!:
1. Professional Web Camers!: Don't bother with the invitation. I don't like the big tease in person, much less over a web cam. Its just not a close substitute for live and in person and never will be! BORING! My imagination can do far more than anything you can do on a webcam.(I have a personal rule, if she is going to put her sexual body parts that close to my face in order to arouse and excite me, she better be more than sure she is willing and able to use them for the purpose she intends or I'll walk!) Enough said!
2. People who use EXCESSIVE profanity: It might be great and exciting to lower your vocabulary to your friends, but some of us find it really obnoxious. You kiss your kids with that mouth? and would you put something in your mouth that you wouldn't hold in your hands?
3. Princesses need not apply: Yes, I'm talking to all the gold diggers, primp princesses, and wanna be queens. High maintenance is only achieved if you can prove you are really worth it. If all you are is a good body, a pretty smile, and a rabid narcissist; you are not that great! I support you for believing in yourself , you should and I applaud it, but not at others expense. Its great to be beautiful, but just because you breathe and recieve attention doesn't make you worthy of everything you want and see. You get what you give......
4. Angry People: Ok, I understand you've been dumped, cheated on, lied to, used, manipulated, swindled, and in some cases, even beaten. You did not deserve that. I was not there, I did none of those things and I will not be compared to others who have done this. I am no angel, not in the least, but I do show respect and courtesy and I expect the same of you. Would it be fair for me to compare you to the women who have hurt me deeply? Would you be offended if I did? Look, I understand that it hurt, I really do. Break the chain, stop the cycle, use what ever cliche' you like, but stop thinking you are the only one who has ever been down that road. Seek out those who have been where you just came from and talk to them, find common ground, Really LISTEN to them and start seeing people for who they are, not for whom you anxiously suspect they will become. It is your choice, I concur, but if you took the time to read my page, you will remember what I said about limiting yourself, you aren't limiting others as you think you are. You will know when you have met a horn dog or not, you've been alive and survived the dating scene for a while haven't you?
( Note: to those who are hurting right now, stop what you are doing and realize you need to heal. Do you really think you'll be able to control those emotions with a new person? or do you think you can make the new person live up to the things you didn't get in the last relationship? Most healthy people will see the damage and let you go before you ever get the chance to suck the life out of them. Think about it for a minute, just because we get hurt doesn't mean the rest of the world owes us anything, not even an apology. The only person who does is the one who hurt us and good luck in trying to get that sincerely. Give it time, don't mess someone else up because someone tore your emotions apart, time does heal, I promise!)
5. Dominatrix types: Look ladies, you serve a purpose in this world, just not my world. I will not serve you. I hate domination and dominating others. A little playfulness is great but if you come at me with a whip and chain, I will defend myself, no matter what the gender. Good luck with that though and enjoy yourself, Mistress! (once and only time I'll ever call you that)
6. People who ask me to send a pic of my genitals: Look ladies, I understand the law of equality. I have no doubt you get 100's of requests a day to send pics of you naked, pics of your breasts, pics of the "bearded clam", but rest assured I will not request them from you. I, of course, will look if you volunteer to show me. Understand, that if you do volunteer, you did so of your own free will. I am a red blooded male, for the love of all things great, but I will not ask you for them and please don't ask me to do the same. That request is a location specific event and I don't do that with just anyone.
7. Any one under the age of 25: Unless you are a friend of my children, or a growing or grown up child of one of my friends, what would we have to talk about? I'm 37, not 17. As you can see in my "Friends" list, my daughter is listed as 1, she is the only one I will allow to do this. I don't care about whats on MTV, what the latest and greatest new fad is, and reality T.V is getting really old! Plus, being accused of Pedophelia is not something I even want to approach or think about! I live in the REAL WORLD, I don't watch it on T.V. I do like some of the music, I do like to dance, but come on young people! I am a father, but not your father. Lets keep it that way ok. Sorry but thats how I feel.
Ok...that is about the gist of it. I'm sure as I look around further I will find more things to add but so far that is what I have dealt with. So if you fit this list, use a little rational thinking and don't tread down that road! Thanks!
Getting to know me through my Blogs
Current mood:cheerful
Thanks for checking in! Just taking a second to encourage you to read my blogs and tell me what you think of anything! If I invited you to subscribe to my blog, it is my way of letting you know I think there is something intriguing about you and i am interested in meeting and talking with you. :) I would like you to know who you are meeting or who is knocking at your door so to speak. I really detest the whole " Hey Cutie!" approach! (Didn't that die in the 90's?) You don't have to subscribe, of course, but I would feel honored if you chose to, and please feel free to add a comment, if you agree, disagree, or just want to be silly and playful! and please say Hi and feel free at any time to ask to be added as a friend! I won't bite, (unless asked of course) and I promise to be a gentleman. As for what you will read, I try to blog what is truly on my mind and how I feel about life. Try to capture the moment like a polaroid! You will learn about me through them and of course check out the rest of my page. I'm trying not to let it get to cluttered with "stuff" but I try to update as much as possible. I would love to subscribe to you as well, but quid pro quo is something I think is best! I can't wait to hear from you and hear about what you see and say about life!
"Please ask the ones who always think that the grass is greener on the other side, if they have ever really taken a minute to really look and see that its only taller, and then ask them if they ever wondered what its fertilized with?"
Quoted by: Me
Thanks for checking in! Just taking a second to encourage you to read my blogs and tell me what you think of anything! If I invited you to subscribe to my blog, it is my way of letting you know I think there is something intriguing about you and i am interested in meeting and talking with you. :) I would like you to know who you are meeting or who is knocking at your door so to speak. I really detest the whole " Hey Cutie!" approach! (Didn't that die in the 90's?) You don't have to subscribe, of course, but I would feel honored if you chose to, and please feel free to add a comment, if you agree, disagree, or just want to be silly and playful! and please say Hi and feel free at any time to ask to be added as a friend! I won't bite, (unless asked of course) and I promise to be a gentleman. As for what you will read, I try to blog what is truly on my mind and how I feel about life. Try to capture the moment like a polaroid! You will learn about me through them and of course check out the rest of my page. I'm trying not to let it get to cluttered with "stuff" but I try to update as much as possible. I would love to subscribe to you as well, but quid pro quo is something I think is best! I can't wait to hear from you and hear about what you see and say about life!
"Please ask the ones who always think that the grass is greener on the other side, if they have ever really taken a minute to really look and see that its only taller, and then ask them if they ever wondered what its fertilized with?"
Quoted by: Me
Things I Don't Find Sexy
Current mood:curious
One of my friends who was linked to me on Myspace (when I used to use it years ago, and when this was actually written, hence the updated version) asked me a rather intriguing question. She asked "What do you think is NOT sexy in a woman?".....I never really gave that much thought because most people ask the complete opposite. So I told her I would give it some thought and get back to her on that. So here is what I thought. (Waiver: these are my personal preferences and no others. No animals or people were injured in the determinations of my thoughts):
1. If you have more piercings on the other parts of your body than you would get in your ears, I just don't find that sexy. Masochistic? yes! Sexy? no! I believe in personal expression, I really do! A few is ok but turning yourself into a pin cushion? Just doesn't do it for me, sorry! Besides, that would make you a walking lightning rod, and I don't want to die that way. If God is going to strike me down, I want it to be for my own transgressions. Don't want to get to the other side and hear the words "OOPS! Sorry about that! You were holding hands"
2. Excessive amount of tattoos is really not sexy either. Tattoos are great, even considering ONE myself. I just don't see the pleasure of tattooing 50% of your body. Don't get me wrong, I know there are some people out there that think it's "cool lookin", but I am not in that crowd. Plus a strategically placed tattoo is sexy, having your throat tattooed is not.
3. Wearing extremely tight clothing that WE ALL KNOW really doesn't fit you and you purposely bought for yourself. Are you trying to convince us or yourself that you are "hot"? Please don't ask the rest of the world "do I look fat in this?" You have your friends for support and to lie to you. The rest of us will not. Now I'm not talking about general clothing, sure things fit tight on us on occasion, can't help that, you have a wardrobe that you must wear after that night of drinking and partying or "the monthly visitor drops by for a week or so". We all swell up from time to time. What I'm talking about is that you know your a size 9 and you purposely try to wear something in, say....... a size 6! Doesn't that hurt? It's gotta hurt (shaking my head)
4. I've touched on this in a past post, its gotta be excessive cussing. Are you kidding me? I agree that swearing has a place in this world. If you want to get your point across in certain situations, use it like a weapon! Stick it to them hard and dirty if you must, to get them to remember. If your conversations consists of an expletive every other word, I will begin to seriously doubt your intellect. Please pick up a dictionary and pick a word of the day if you must and then use it in a sentence. I promise you, you will make friends and influence people.
So there you go, my short list. I'm easy to please! I really have nothing against anyone who exhibits any of the above, just please don't expect me to find you sexy. Will I accept you as a person...of course! Will I want to date you? Probably not.
One of my friends who was linked to me on Myspace (when I used to use it years ago, and when this was actually written, hence the updated version) asked me a rather intriguing question. She asked "What do you think is NOT sexy in a woman?".....I never really gave that much thought because most people ask the complete opposite. So I told her I would give it some thought and get back to her on that. So here is what I thought. (Waiver: these are my personal preferences and no others. No animals or people were injured in the determinations of my thoughts):
1. If you have more piercings on the other parts of your body than you would get in your ears, I just don't find that sexy. Masochistic? yes! Sexy? no! I believe in personal expression, I really do! A few is ok but turning yourself into a pin cushion? Just doesn't do it for me, sorry! Besides, that would make you a walking lightning rod, and I don't want to die that way. If God is going to strike me down, I want it to be for my own transgressions. Don't want to get to the other side and hear the words "OOPS! Sorry about that! You were holding hands"
2. Excessive amount of tattoos is really not sexy either. Tattoos are great, even considering ONE myself. I just don't see the pleasure of tattooing 50% of your body. Don't get me wrong, I know there are some people out there that think it's "cool lookin", but I am not in that crowd. Plus a strategically placed tattoo is sexy, having your throat tattooed is not.
3. Wearing extremely tight clothing that WE ALL KNOW really doesn't fit you and you purposely bought for yourself. Are you trying to convince us or yourself that you are "hot"? Please don't ask the rest of the world "do I look fat in this?" You have your friends for support and to lie to you. The rest of us will not. Now I'm not talking about general clothing, sure things fit tight on us on occasion, can't help that, you have a wardrobe that you must wear after that night of drinking and partying or "the monthly visitor drops by for a week or so". We all swell up from time to time. What I'm talking about is that you know your a size 9 and you purposely try to wear something in, say....... a size 6! Doesn't that hurt? It's gotta hurt (shaking my head)
4. I've touched on this in a past post, its gotta be excessive cussing. Are you kidding me? I agree that swearing has a place in this world. If you want to get your point across in certain situations, use it like a weapon! Stick it to them hard and dirty if you must, to get them to remember. If your conversations consists of an expletive every other word, I will begin to seriously doubt your intellect. Please pick up a dictionary and pick a word of the day if you must and then use it in a sentence. I promise you, you will make friends and influence people.
So there you go, my short list. I'm easy to please! I really have nothing against anyone who exhibits any of the above, just please don't expect me to find you sexy. Will I accept you as a person...of course! Will I want to date you? Probably not.
The "Hey Baby!" Syndrome
Current mood:amused
I was talking to a friend Saturday and we were talking the "Hey Baby" syndrome that most people seem to suffer from on the web and dating sites. I find it a bit strange that the most equivilant thing most men AND women can muster to say as a greeting is that phrase or something that sounds close to it. Do people really think the "nightclub/bar" pickup word is just as effective over the web. Do we all have to sound like "Butthead" from "Beavis & Butthead" (hated those guys! Uhhhh!)
As you notice on my page, I don't have alot of "friends' per say. It's my choice on how I handle myself and who I talk to. Each of the people on my page have something different about them that sets them apart for me. They have a charisma, a glamour, if you will, that make them so genuinely unique. Each one was so gracious to share who they were with me. They were not pretentious, only candid and that is so absolutely refreshing. I knew when I contacted them, or they contacted me, that there was someone there that I would really enjoy getting to know. Not one ever approached me with "Hey baby, your hot!" or "Damn, you are fine!" or some cheesy crap I see on so many of the comments on this medium or any other for that matter. I want to thank them all for being themselves. I've disapproved quite a few but please don't think badly of it....Don't just assume that just because you are ugly, average, cute, beautiful, or dropdead gorgeous I will start drooling, run in fear,or be rude, or instantly add you. You need have a bit more than that. To those who disapprove of me, I don't take it personally. You feel what you feel, nothing wrong with that.
Just the same, I might answer you and I might not, if you hollar "Hey Baby! I want to meet that!" Take your chance, but don't get your hopes up there, Killer! LOL
P.S... The best line so far I have recieved is " Damn! I wish you were an M&M! I'd make you melt in my mouth and in my hands"
Ladies! Have you been reading from the "Cheesy Pick Up Line" dictionary again? LOL...it didn't work on you, so what do you think it would do for me? LOL
I was talking to a friend Saturday and we were talking the "Hey Baby" syndrome that most people seem to suffer from on the web and dating sites. I find it a bit strange that the most equivilant thing most men AND women can muster to say as a greeting is that phrase or something that sounds close to it. Do people really think the "nightclub/bar" pickup word is just as effective over the web. Do we all have to sound like "Butthead" from "Beavis & Butthead" (hated those guys! Uhhhh!)
As you notice on my page, I don't have alot of "friends' per say. It's my choice on how I handle myself and who I talk to. Each of the people on my page have something different about them that sets them apart for me. They have a charisma, a glamour, if you will, that make them so genuinely unique. Each one was so gracious to share who they were with me. They were not pretentious, only candid and that is so absolutely refreshing. I knew when I contacted them, or they contacted me, that there was someone there that I would really enjoy getting to know. Not one ever approached me with "Hey baby, your hot!" or "Damn, you are fine!" or some cheesy crap I see on so many of the comments on this medium or any other for that matter. I want to thank them all for being themselves. I've disapproved quite a few but please don't think badly of it....Don't just assume that just because you are ugly, average, cute, beautiful, or dropdead gorgeous I will start drooling, run in fear,or be rude, or instantly add you. You need have a bit more than that. To those who disapprove of me, I don't take it personally. You feel what you feel, nothing wrong with that.
Just the same, I might answer you and I might not, if you hollar "Hey Baby! I want to meet that!" Take your chance, but don't get your hopes up there, Killer! LOL
P.S... The best line so far I have recieved is " Damn! I wish you were an M&M! I'd make you melt in my mouth and in my hands"
Ladies! Have you been reading from the "Cheesy Pick Up Line" dictionary again? LOL...it didn't work on you, so what do you think it would do for me? LOL
Asker Beware!!!
Current mood:optimistic
Issues, Issues, Issues.....we all have them. One way or the other we all have to draw into our own past for learned lessons. Now, some never learn from those moments, while others seal off the spirit that made them who they are to protect it. Both are extremely easy to do...the hardest thing is going forward by not doing either. Extremes are the danger points that we hurt others with. We may be too quick to judge others on their transgressions, but we hate it when it is done to us.
I follow this rule, as I am a very open and forthright man.....I, like you, have a past. I have skeletons in my closet and if you want to know then ask me. I will tell you honestly, but if you choose to enter that closet then don't be surprised, hurt, disappointed, or judgemental by what you find. Your choice to enter is driven by your own curiousity. You were not there in my past and you cannot gauge me by those things that you were never a part of. If I repeat those things, then I never learned and you can gauge me accordingly.
Askers Beware!
Beware that someone will want to walk through your closet too.
Issues, Issues, Issues.....we all have them. One way or the other we all have to draw into our own past for learned lessons. Now, some never learn from those moments, while others seal off the spirit that made them who they are to protect it. Both are extremely easy to do...the hardest thing is going forward by not doing either. Extremes are the danger points that we hurt others with. We may be too quick to judge others on their transgressions, but we hate it when it is done to us.
I follow this rule, as I am a very open and forthright man.....I, like you, have a past. I have skeletons in my closet and if you want to know then ask me. I will tell you honestly, but if you choose to enter that closet then don't be surprised, hurt, disappointed, or judgemental by what you find. Your choice to enter is driven by your own curiousity. You were not there in my past and you cannot gauge me by those things that you were never a part of. If I repeat those things, then I never learned and you can gauge me accordingly.
Askers Beware!
Beware that someone will want to walk through your closet too.
Comparisons
Current mood:thoughtful
I just had a great conversation today with a friend of mine and she has been having some issues with a "friend" concerning a "Drive by Love you!"...(for some of you that is meeting someone great and really into you and tells you they want you and then BOOM! they bail!) Ok, we have all heard the words when they come back days later, weeks later, even months later....
Let's go down the list quickly:
"I was scared because: (fill in your blank)"
"I felt that you were going to fast for me, but I realized: (fill in your blank)"
"I didn't realize I cared about you this much until: (fill in your blank)
"In my last realtionship(marriage) things happened that I thought: (fill in your blank):
and finally,
"Well, what about you? You didn't have to(blank) and it scared me."
Now usually we will think the worst of ourselves but to be honest, it usually means they are still looking over the fence to see if the grass is really greener and really just want you there to lean against in case it isn't.(CHECK,CHECK! STAND BY IN 5..) But in some rare occasions, we do meet people who are generally terrified of getting into a relationship but are just tired of being alone. A FLOATER! LOL
Now most of this takes place in the "phone call" that is placed by the perpetrator (yes, that is what they are! you read correctly). Now this does sound a bit cynical in writing but stay with me here. Now my friend has decided to give this person another chance and for that I have nothing but happiness in my heart to know I have a compassionate and passionate friend in my life of this caliber. Some might say she is crazy, some might say she is understanding, and as for me I say just get happy my friend, yet I find myself also thinking and wishing her a warning too.
Now as I read the things he told her about why "he disappeared and changed so suddenly" I really started to feel a familiar feeling. I have heard all these things in my past as well, and if I really sat down to think, I bet I've even said them to someone. I also know how empty those words are ....in my experience, they have always been. Now, I am compassionate to an umpteenth degree, but usually that is the beginning of the end. My experience has taught me that if they'll do it once, they'll do it over and over...passive aggressive, hot or cold, what ever you want to call it. Definition of insanity: doing the same thing, the same way, over and over again believing you'll get a different outcome THIS TIME!
Now, most of the "phrases" used above, in my opinion are truly excuses. Plain and simple, neat and clean. They are COMPARISONS! Unrequired, unnecessary, and unwanted. If someone meets you and really likes you then they should also want to meet YOU! Take you for yourself....not to see if you are as close to what they lost as it can get. They 'll either make the changes in themselves or blame you for not changing to make them comfortable...this is "forcing the ideal" and none of us can make that happen. They won't be able to let go of the comparisons and you will be insulted by it and this works vice versa also.
You don't have to filet yourself like a fish to be open with someone but you do have to be objective....When I have a conversation with a woman and she is willing to talk, I really listen...if all she can do is badmouth the last guy then I get a bit suspicious...I realize how relationships work...I can appreciate a person more who will be more objective than subjective. I know I was not perfect in my past but I feel great that I took steps to look at myself and see where I have problems and work to change those things. I bet if you were to talk to an ex they would probably open your eyes after you got past all the "they're an asshole and I was perfect" BS...Unless you have a pattern, how can you compare anything...assumptions are usally used as comparisons. Hence the confusion!
Comparisons are easy outs, excuses to run, hide, and even cheat if used correctly. These are leeches to our basic need to want to be compassionate, to rescue something or someone. I don't blame my ex's for my actions with someone else, and you shouldn't allow it either. Acceptance, understanding and care are wonderful things and so many many times they are taken for granted, feared, or even ridiculed. Should you hide or withhold those things from anyone? NO WAY! SHARE THEM FREELY! BE PROUD YOU ARE THAT BEAUTIFUL! Should you allow them to be abused with comparisons to be manipulated...HELL NO! You are the healthy one, you are the light that attracted them, darkness always gravitates toward the light. Shine all of you! VERY, VERY BRIGHTLY!
But what do I know? I'm still single and not in love....LOL...BUT I HAVE AN UNLIMITED AND UNDYING AMOUNT OF HOPE!
I just had a great conversation today with a friend of mine and she has been having some issues with a "friend" concerning a "Drive by Love you!"...(for some of you that is meeting someone great and really into you and tells you they want you and then BOOM! they bail!) Ok, we have all heard the words when they come back days later, weeks later, even months later....
Let's go down the list quickly:
"I was scared because: (fill in your blank)"
"I felt that you were going to fast for me, but I realized: (fill in your blank)"
"I didn't realize I cared about you this much until: (fill in your blank)
"In my last realtionship(marriage) things happened that I thought: (fill in your blank):
and finally,
"Well, what about you? You didn't have to(blank) and it scared me."
Now usually we will think the worst of ourselves but to be honest, it usually means they are still looking over the fence to see if the grass is really greener and really just want you there to lean against in case it isn't.(CHECK,CHECK! STAND BY IN 5..) But in some rare occasions, we do meet people who are generally terrified of getting into a relationship but are just tired of being alone. A FLOATER! LOL
Now most of this takes place in the "phone call" that is placed by the perpetrator (yes, that is what they are! you read correctly). Now this does sound a bit cynical in writing but stay with me here. Now my friend has decided to give this person another chance and for that I have nothing but happiness in my heart to know I have a compassionate and passionate friend in my life of this caliber. Some might say she is crazy, some might say she is understanding, and as for me I say just get happy my friend, yet I find myself also thinking and wishing her a warning too.
Now as I read the things he told her about why "he disappeared and changed so suddenly" I really started to feel a familiar feeling. I have heard all these things in my past as well, and if I really sat down to think, I bet I've even said them to someone. I also know how empty those words are ....in my experience, they have always been. Now, I am compassionate to an umpteenth degree, but usually that is the beginning of the end. My experience has taught me that if they'll do it once, they'll do it over and over...passive aggressive, hot or cold, what ever you want to call it. Definition of insanity: doing the same thing, the same way, over and over again believing you'll get a different outcome THIS TIME!
Now, most of the "phrases" used above, in my opinion are truly excuses. Plain and simple, neat and clean. They are COMPARISONS! Unrequired, unnecessary, and unwanted. If someone meets you and really likes you then they should also want to meet YOU! Take you for yourself....not to see if you are as close to what they lost as it can get. They 'll either make the changes in themselves or blame you for not changing to make them comfortable...this is "forcing the ideal" and none of us can make that happen. They won't be able to let go of the comparisons and you will be insulted by it and this works vice versa also.
You don't have to filet yourself like a fish to be open with someone but you do have to be objective....When I have a conversation with a woman and she is willing to talk, I really listen...if all she can do is badmouth the last guy then I get a bit suspicious...I realize how relationships work...I can appreciate a person more who will be more objective than subjective. I know I was not perfect in my past but I feel great that I took steps to look at myself and see where I have problems and work to change those things. I bet if you were to talk to an ex they would probably open your eyes after you got past all the "they're an asshole and I was perfect" BS...Unless you have a pattern, how can you compare anything...assumptions are usally used as comparisons. Hence the confusion!
Comparisons are easy outs, excuses to run, hide, and even cheat if used correctly. These are leeches to our basic need to want to be compassionate, to rescue something or someone. I don't blame my ex's for my actions with someone else, and you shouldn't allow it either. Acceptance, understanding and care are wonderful things and so many many times they are taken for granted, feared, or even ridiculed. Should you hide or withhold those things from anyone? NO WAY! SHARE THEM FREELY! BE PROUD YOU ARE THAT BEAUTIFUL! Should you allow them to be abused with comparisons to be manipulated...HELL NO! You are the healthy one, you are the light that attracted them, darkness always gravitates toward the light. Shine all of you! VERY, VERY BRIGHTLY!
But what do I know? I'm still single and not in love....LOL...BUT I HAVE AN UNLIMITED AND UNDYING AMOUNT OF HOPE!
Flashes of Grace
Current mood:thankful
As I have been using this medium for a little while, I am so very glad to have met the friends I have made. I have been able to reconnect with a few old friends, some family members, and have made some absolutely outstanding, enlightning, and beautiful "friends" along the way. I call these "Flashes of Grace".
In a journey, we have no clue of where we might go and we can turn around and see where we have been. We have an idea of where we would like to go in life and can plan to get there, but nothing really more than that. Even the best laid plans can fail us. (if you think you've reached the end of the journey and have all you ever dreamed, you might want to check your pulse, because your DEAD!) In understanding this, we need to remember a smile can gleam the treasures we have left to mark where we have been, and a callous word or deed can reveal to us the destruction we have left in our wake. But what about taking that step forward?
How is that revealed to us?
Through "Flashes of Grace".
We literally see what is in front of us, but fortune telling is a bit beyond most of our reach. (As someone who has never met someone who could, I'm a bit skeptical but for this moment, I'll defer to the unknown.) We sometimes find ourselves metaphorically "walking in the dark", and then suddenly a "flash" happens. Like a strike of lightning in the middle of the night. It sends the whole road awash in bright light. It illuminates the road and allows us long enough to find a bearing. A moment of strength to take a step forward. Even if its just a small step, because the next step will follow soon.....and another and another until the difference of the sunrise makes it easier to touch the day, and there, standing in the road with you, are those that made things possible for you to take steps. To share that day with you.
Those wonderful "Flashes of Grace".
I cherish mine, as should all who recognize their own, and any new ones who might appear and grace my life..
As I have been using this medium for a little while, I am so very glad to have met the friends I have made. I have been able to reconnect with a few old friends, some family members, and have made some absolutely outstanding, enlightning, and beautiful "friends" along the way. I call these "Flashes of Grace".
In a journey, we have no clue of where we might go and we can turn around and see where we have been. We have an idea of where we would like to go in life and can plan to get there, but nothing really more than that. Even the best laid plans can fail us. (if you think you've reached the end of the journey and have all you ever dreamed, you might want to check your pulse, because your DEAD!) In understanding this, we need to remember a smile can gleam the treasures we have left to mark where we have been, and a callous word or deed can reveal to us the destruction we have left in our wake. But what about taking that step forward?
How is that revealed to us?
Through "Flashes of Grace".
We literally see what is in front of us, but fortune telling is a bit beyond most of our reach. (As someone who has never met someone who could, I'm a bit skeptical but for this moment, I'll defer to the unknown.) We sometimes find ourselves metaphorically "walking in the dark", and then suddenly a "flash" happens. Like a strike of lightning in the middle of the night. It sends the whole road awash in bright light. It illuminates the road and allows us long enough to find a bearing. A moment of strength to take a step forward. Even if its just a small step, because the next step will follow soon.....and another and another until the difference of the sunrise makes it easier to touch the day, and there, standing in the road with you, are those that made things possible for you to take steps. To share that day with you.
Those wonderful "Flashes of Grace".
I cherish mine, as should all who recognize their own, and any new ones who might appear and grace my life..
The Depth of Maliciousness
Current mood:confused
Considering the last 72 hours, I have had quite a lot to think about. Now, I am philosophic on most things in life. I'm really a laid back gentleman who doesn't sweat the small things in life. I easily let most things roll off my back but look to what the future may hold. But even the most optimistic get a bit grinded. I feel that way today, so please excuse the mess. I rarely complain about much so this is uncharted territory for me now.
I have had the opportunity to look further into the depth of people, and as someone who lives his life by the creed "treat others as you would have them treat you"...I just am confounded at just how twisted and jaded so many are in this world. Perhaps my optimism is clouding my realism, I'm just not sure. I know I am not niave' by any means, but I am just trying to wrap my mind around what causes people to do malicious and calculated deeds for what ever reason, be it for entertainment, vindictiveness, or just out and out immaturity. To just ask why is not enough.
I never have understood abusers. Either physical, mental, or verbal. I've learned how to deal with them but I just don't understand their needs. I mean, I know you can't reason with them because they are great manipulators. They truly only understand one option, and usually that has to be enforced painfully and decisively, and they usually whine and cry afterwards. I have no sympathy and definitely cannot empathize. If I ever hear the phrase "Look what you made me do.....", mercy will not be in my repertoire in dealing with them, Let God do that. Respect is not only earned, it to be nurtured and protected. Those who seek comfort and entertainment in maliciousness are to be shunned and given no respect in all matters until they want to learn to cherish it as much as we do.
You know, as angry as I feel inside at the moment, I will have to give credit to those who have given me so much hope and comfort. My oldest daughter is my angel, my beacon of guidance to look to the future and to strive to achieve more. She is my joy of joys. My littlest protector in life who can roar as one of the mightiest. She makes being a father greater than any words I can express to you in this way. My youngest daughter is my mischevious little scamp who brings the gift of wonder to my life. The all seeing eye of amazement she possesses keeps me seeking new adventures and to continue the curiousity of how things "work". My cousin Kim is the epitomy of endurance and achievement. She is the little sister I never had, but always knew. She is the strength that binded a family, a shield that survived the crush of mayhem, and a dear woman who loved and still loves deeply inspite of it all. She did the best she could with what she was dealt and never compromised. She wasn't perfect, but the achievements she helped mold in many lives will be evident for generations yet to come.
I have no wish to explore the depth of maliciousness, but I also have no urge to experience its stinging effects either. They only weapons we have to defend against it is the truth of our own integrity, faith in the care we hope to share and recieve with others, and to respect all who demonstrate that respect is a piece of their life that they cherish.
Considering the last 72 hours, I have had quite a lot to think about. Now, I am philosophic on most things in life. I'm really a laid back gentleman who doesn't sweat the small things in life. I easily let most things roll off my back but look to what the future may hold. But even the most optimistic get a bit grinded. I feel that way today, so please excuse the mess. I rarely complain about much so this is uncharted territory for me now.
I have had the opportunity to look further into the depth of people, and as someone who lives his life by the creed "treat others as you would have them treat you"...I just am confounded at just how twisted and jaded so many are in this world. Perhaps my optimism is clouding my realism, I'm just not sure. I know I am not niave' by any means, but I am just trying to wrap my mind around what causes people to do malicious and calculated deeds for what ever reason, be it for entertainment, vindictiveness, or just out and out immaturity. To just ask why is not enough.
I never have understood abusers. Either physical, mental, or verbal. I've learned how to deal with them but I just don't understand their needs. I mean, I know you can't reason with them because they are great manipulators. They truly only understand one option, and usually that has to be enforced painfully and decisively, and they usually whine and cry afterwards. I have no sympathy and definitely cannot empathize. If I ever hear the phrase "Look what you made me do.....", mercy will not be in my repertoire in dealing with them, Let God do that. Respect is not only earned, it to be nurtured and protected. Those who seek comfort and entertainment in maliciousness are to be shunned and given no respect in all matters until they want to learn to cherish it as much as we do.
You know, as angry as I feel inside at the moment, I will have to give credit to those who have given me so much hope and comfort. My oldest daughter is my angel, my beacon of guidance to look to the future and to strive to achieve more. She is my joy of joys. My littlest protector in life who can roar as one of the mightiest. She makes being a father greater than any words I can express to you in this way. My youngest daughter is my mischevious little scamp who brings the gift of wonder to my life. The all seeing eye of amazement she possesses keeps me seeking new adventures and to continue the curiousity of how things "work". My cousin Kim is the epitomy of endurance and achievement. She is the little sister I never had, but always knew. She is the strength that binded a family, a shield that survived the crush of mayhem, and a dear woman who loved and still loves deeply inspite of it all. She did the best she could with what she was dealt and never compromised. She wasn't perfect, but the achievements she helped mold in many lives will be evident for generations yet to come.
I have no wish to explore the depth of maliciousness, but I also have no urge to experience its stinging effects either. They only weapons we have to defend against it is the truth of our own integrity, faith in the care we hope to share and recieve with others, and to respect all who demonstrate that respect is a piece of their life that they cherish.
Finally! Hell Explained!!!
Current mood:energetic
Borrowed from another post..All the credit for this one belongs to another..but it is worth plaguerizing..Its too Funny!!! Thank you to whom ever you are who wrote this!!! :
HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a University of
Washington chemistry mid-term.
The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"
Borrowed from another post..All the credit for this one belongs to another..but it is worth plaguerizing..Its too Funny!!! Thank you to whom ever you are who wrote this!!! :
HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a University of
Washington chemistry mid-term.
The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"
To Honor A Great Friend
Current mood:nostalgic
It has been almost 9 months since my last blog and I have busy conducting life and getting things moved in the right direction. Many things have happened, and changes are plentiful. I have moved to a new city; felt the slings of guilt, pain, and disappointment, but yet I have also embraced the new, rejoiced in the enternal moment of hope, and bathed in the shimmer of resurrection.
Today, I express my admiration and love for a dear and wonderful man who passed only a few hours ago. This man's name is Robert Hawkins. For those of you who do not know, this was my oldest daughter's Grandfather, He was also a Father to Cheryl, Lindsey's Mother; To Mark; Lindsey's Uncle, and of course Shirley, Lindsey's Grandmother, a Loving Husband. He was, and always will be, to me, an irreplacible Friend and dearly loved person whom I can never forget and will always be grateful to have graced my life .
It was Robert, who saw past the difficulties of a failed relationship between his daughter and I. He extended his hand of friendship first. He was the one who showed me kindness, when there was none to been seen. He was the one who put the differences aside and looked deeper. He was the one who stepped forward when others wouldn't. He lead when others refused. He restored the faith to bring 2 families together. He lead the way when others were prideful, and I include myself in that group. That kind of kindness can never be duplicated. He believed when others doubted. You cannot find that kind of insight very often. I truly was blessed in having him in my life, and my life will be emptier with out him to speak and listen to. He spoke up on my behalf, and now it is my turn to return the honor he gave to me.
Robert Hawkins, you are a devoted Husband and Father, a cherished Grandfather, an astounding friend, and an iconic figure in so many lives. Your strength and wisdom is realized by so many and appreciated by so many more. My gratitude and admiration will be undying and my tears will be short, only because you asked that of me, even as difficult as that may be right at this moment. Your last request of me was to make sure that Lindsey would always know how much you loved her, to make sure she always knows how much I love her, and to share with her the thoughts, the memories, and feelings you shared with me. That is an honor that I will never let fail and will do so with great love.
To Robert Hawkins,
It has been almost 9 months since my last blog and I have busy conducting life and getting things moved in the right direction. Many things have happened, and changes are plentiful. I have moved to a new city; felt the slings of guilt, pain, and disappointment, but yet I have also embraced the new, rejoiced in the enternal moment of hope, and bathed in the shimmer of resurrection.
Today, I express my admiration and love for a dear and wonderful man who passed only a few hours ago. This man's name is Robert Hawkins. For those of you who do not know, this was my oldest daughter's Grandfather, He was also a Father to Cheryl, Lindsey's Mother; To Mark; Lindsey's Uncle, and of course Shirley, Lindsey's Grandmother, a Loving Husband. He was, and always will be, to me, an irreplacible Friend and dearly loved person whom I can never forget and will always be grateful to have graced my life .
It was Robert, who saw past the difficulties of a failed relationship between his daughter and I. He extended his hand of friendship first. He was the one who showed me kindness, when there was none to been seen. He was the one who put the differences aside and looked deeper. He was the one who stepped forward when others wouldn't. He lead when others refused. He restored the faith to bring 2 families together. He lead the way when others were prideful, and I include myself in that group. That kind of kindness can never be duplicated. He believed when others doubted. You cannot find that kind of insight very often. I truly was blessed in having him in my life, and my life will be emptier with out him to speak and listen to. He spoke up on my behalf, and now it is my turn to return the honor he gave to me.
Robert Hawkins, you are a devoted Husband and Father, a cherished Grandfather, an astounding friend, and an iconic figure in so many lives. Your strength and wisdom is realized by so many and appreciated by so many more. My gratitude and admiration will be undying and my tears will be short, only because you asked that of me, even as difficult as that may be right at this moment. Your last request of me was to make sure that Lindsey would always know how much you loved her, to make sure she always knows how much I love her, and to share with her the thoughts, the memories, and feelings you shared with me. That is an honor that I will never let fail and will do so with great love.
To Robert Hawkins,
To My Daughter
Current mood:blessed
To My Daughter,
As a Daddy, I have always held you as my greatest love, as my most astounding accomplishment, and as the part of my heart that I can truly share with this world without fear but with protective anticipation.
As a Daddy, Your Happiness is my Happiness. When I see and feel your joy, it is then I truly know the meaning of jubilation, the touch of excitement, and the caress of satisfaction.
As a Daddy, your pain is my pain. When life touches you harshly, I feel it. It is my strength that will carry you through, just as those before me felt it, and carried me, I can and will carry you.
As a Daddy, no matter how far away I may be physically, I can never be emotionally. You are the love of my life, the center of my strength, and the wonder of my world. I can never be anything else.
As a Daddy, It is my duty to honor you, to support you, to guide you, and to protect you; but it is my greatest duty to love you. I will never fail you in that.
As you go through a really bad time, I want you to know that I have not left you, that I have not wavered, and that I love you with all I am.
Love,
Daddy
To My Daughter,
As a Daddy, I have always held you as my greatest love, as my most astounding accomplishment, and as the part of my heart that I can truly share with this world without fear but with protective anticipation.
As a Daddy, Your Happiness is my Happiness. When I see and feel your joy, it is then I truly know the meaning of jubilation, the touch of excitement, and the caress of satisfaction.
As a Daddy, your pain is my pain. When life touches you harshly, I feel it. It is my strength that will carry you through, just as those before me felt it, and carried me, I can and will carry you.
As a Daddy, no matter how far away I may be physically, I can never be emotionally. You are the love of my life, the center of my strength, and the wonder of my world. I can never be anything else.
As a Daddy, It is my duty to honor you, to support you, to guide you, and to protect you; but it is my greatest duty to love you. I will never fail you in that.
As you go through a really bad time, I want you to know that I have not left you, that I have not wavered, and that I love you with all I am.
Love,
Daddy
The Anti-Male
Current mood:inquisitive
As someone who roams many social sites quite often, I do read the blogs, the descriptions, the captions, the comments.....and I am definitely ready to comment ....let's roar!
I read of so much pain, so let's talk about that......
To so many of you that spend so much wasted time espousing to WHAT YOU WILL NOT DO or WHAT YOU THINK YOU DESERVE because of the past: As someone who has been in your situation, I can tell you that so many of us, men, recognize and realize that YOU have run into jerks and psychos in your life. Let me ask you some questions. DON'T YOU THINK THAT WE HAVE NOT HAD OUR JERKS AND PSYCHOS AS WELL! (since you place us as a block, you are wanting to sum us as "The Three Musketeers" exclamation..."All for one and one for all".... we know how it works and you couldn't be more wrong...we are not that organized, as a gender that is!) Are you so blinded by your ego and previous pain that you cannot be objective and see some of us as who we are, and not what you anticipate as to "what you think we should become or what you fear we WILL become"? Didn't you think we are aware that our gender is just as guilty as yours? The lines have become blurred and no one can see anymore. As someone who does not make promises that I can't keep, it amazes me that so many of you "ladies" are willing to expect so much, and give so little. Why? "Next" should only be so lucky as to get the first escape route out of YOUR life.
I say this in respect to someone who has really made great strides in her life, someone who was where you were, and that has come out the other side with a new perspective that hopefully she will never let someone take away from her. This I pray for the most. Not for any reason.....not for love, not for anticipation, and especially not for reconnection. She is a stronger woman now, a vibrant woman, and she is even more remarkable for it. I played a very, very small role in the transformation, but I am so very honored in being allowed to be a part of it. With that expressed, she is a greater soul now and I can only hope she holds onto it. Never forget just how far she's come and where it was she started from. Those ties have been released. I am nothing but a footnote and glad to be that. You are very welcome, but I didn't do anything except point the way, you took the steps. I do hope that many in this medium can find the strength she has. It would be very rewarding to just witness. I don't even have or want to be there. Just to witness is enough.
Now, this blog is not for everyone. I understand that, but have we become so jaded, so narcissistic, our own personal judgment so clouded, that we seek to create the "Anti Male"? Yes, you read that right " The Anti Male". Everything you so want in a man that you are so hell bent on destroying one to achieve what you truly want. Don't you realize that if you don't have the expertise to build or rebuild something, you shouldn't try it? Would you try to tear down your car engine or your favorite appliance if you didn't know how to put it back together correctly and make it operate as it should? Hell, most men don't even know how to do that. The descriptive is a metaphor. Yes, I know that men and women are not literally these objects, but its used as a point of contrast. Its like taking something apart and putting it back together and when you are all finished, you have some parts left over. "Uh oh....where did these pieces fit?" Aaaaa..just plug it in and let it run anyway.....just chuck the rest in the junk drawer. We'll figure that out later. Then when your car's engine blows up or your house burns down, you wonder to yourself, "Maybe I really did need those pieces..(as you cry and then scratch your head with confusion...)
Now, this is not an accusation that YOU should try to do this, or that every women does this. Its an observation that ALOT of "us" do this on both sides. In many of ways, my gender is their own worst enemy, but again, more questions.....Do you really think we, as men, want your help in that? Would you walk into a situation that you were automatically set up to fail and no matter how you proceeded, you could not succeed? This man does not. Let's try a common sense question, if you feed a fire gasoline, what happens? If you classify your bad behavior, as "self preservation", do you really think you will get what you really crave, in return? When that same bad behavior is shown to you, does that make you more endeared to him? I'm not a real gambling man, but I'd take that bet on your answer.
Help to stop creating the "Anti Male"....
I make mistakes just as you do, but I am not the "Anti Male".....and I will not accept your "Three Musketeers" explanation of me...
If you want a good man, then let him be a good man.....
Let's use a lyric to sum it up...
I got so tired of that; I got so lonely
I dropped down and I called out to Heaven
"Send me someone to love"
and Heaven shot back
" You get the love that you allow"
And everything is different now
As someone who roams many social sites quite often, I do read the blogs, the descriptions, the captions, the comments.....and I am definitely ready to comment ....let's roar!
I read of so much pain, so let's talk about that......
To so many of you that spend so much wasted time espousing to WHAT YOU WILL NOT DO or WHAT YOU THINK YOU DESERVE because of the past: As someone who has been in your situation, I can tell you that so many of us, men, recognize and realize that YOU have run into jerks and psychos in your life. Let me ask you some questions. DON'T YOU THINK THAT WE HAVE NOT HAD OUR JERKS AND PSYCHOS AS WELL! (since you place us as a block, you are wanting to sum us as "The Three Musketeers" exclamation..."All for one and one for all".... we know how it works and you couldn't be more wrong...we are not that organized, as a gender that is!) Are you so blinded by your ego and previous pain that you cannot be objective and see some of us as who we are, and not what you anticipate as to "what you think we should become or what you fear we WILL become"? Didn't you think we are aware that our gender is just as guilty as yours? The lines have become blurred and no one can see anymore. As someone who does not make promises that I can't keep, it amazes me that so many of you "ladies" are willing to expect so much, and give so little. Why? "Next" should only be so lucky as to get the first escape route out of YOUR life.
I say this in respect to someone who has really made great strides in her life, someone who was where you were, and that has come out the other side with a new perspective that hopefully she will never let someone take away from her. This I pray for the most. Not for any reason.....not for love, not for anticipation, and especially not for reconnection. She is a stronger woman now, a vibrant woman, and she is even more remarkable for it. I played a very, very small role in the transformation, but I am so very honored in being allowed to be a part of it. With that expressed, she is a greater soul now and I can only hope she holds onto it. Never forget just how far she's come and where it was she started from. Those ties have been released. I am nothing but a footnote and glad to be that. You are very welcome, but I didn't do anything except point the way, you took the steps. I do hope that many in this medium can find the strength she has. It would be very rewarding to just witness. I don't even have or want to be there. Just to witness is enough.
Now, this blog is not for everyone. I understand that, but have we become so jaded, so narcissistic, our own personal judgment so clouded, that we seek to create the "Anti Male"? Yes, you read that right " The Anti Male". Everything you so want in a man that you are so hell bent on destroying one to achieve what you truly want. Don't you realize that if you don't have the expertise to build or rebuild something, you shouldn't try it? Would you try to tear down your car engine or your favorite appliance if you didn't know how to put it back together correctly and make it operate as it should? Hell, most men don't even know how to do that. The descriptive is a metaphor. Yes, I know that men and women are not literally these objects, but its used as a point of contrast. Its like taking something apart and putting it back together and when you are all finished, you have some parts left over. "Uh oh....where did these pieces fit?" Aaaaa..just plug it in and let it run anyway.....just chuck the rest in the junk drawer. We'll figure that out later. Then when your car's engine blows up or your house burns down, you wonder to yourself, "Maybe I really did need those pieces..(as you cry and then scratch your head with confusion...)
Now, this is not an accusation that YOU should try to do this, or that every women does this. Its an observation that ALOT of "us" do this on both sides. In many of ways, my gender is their own worst enemy, but again, more questions.....Do you really think we, as men, want your help in that? Would you walk into a situation that you were automatically set up to fail and no matter how you proceeded, you could not succeed? This man does not. Let's try a common sense question, if you feed a fire gasoline, what happens? If you classify your bad behavior, as "self preservation", do you really think you will get what you really crave, in return? When that same bad behavior is shown to you, does that make you more endeared to him? I'm not a real gambling man, but I'd take that bet on your answer.
Help to stop creating the "Anti Male"....
I make mistakes just as you do, but I am not the "Anti Male".....and I will not accept your "Three Musketeers" explanation of me...
If you want a good man, then let him be a good man.....
Let's use a lyric to sum it up...
I got so tired of that; I got so lonely
I dropped down and I called out to Heaven
"Send me someone to love"
and Heaven shot back
" You get the love that you allow"
And everything is different now
Tales from the Road
Current mood:amused
Now, as most of you have read, or to those who know me personally; I am a FedEx courier. "The FedEx Guy"..in laymans terms. We, as a group, are usually running around your office, shipping/receiving, and are weaving and dodging you or your loved ones and friends in traffic with our trucks. We have the "opportunity" to go to places and meet people that some of you might be a little scared of........ at first. (they sometimes scare us too..LOL) We go into places that even the police are really nervous about trespassing into. We do it without fear (most of the time) because we have something the police never have....something for them.... a package! Something that they will want! LOL...We don't go get something unless we are called! LOL....
Our job introduces us to the most "perculiar" people....hmmm...feeling one of those moments again....this one involves beer and breasts....got your attention on that one didn't I?
Come ride with me for a while....buckle up cause its Saturday morning and we are delivering!
Its a chilly late October morning 2008, around 7: 45 a.m., and we have 28 packages to deliver before noon. We have around 14 square miles to cover in that time. Trust me, that is A LOT of miles! We have routed the packages by addresses and zip codes on our truck and our first stop is very close to the station. An apartment building very near the State capital buildings of Oklahoma. We have just left the station and it only takes us about 4 minutes to the stop. We grab the package (letter) and spring out the sliding door of our truck. We walk to the door and knock loudly. The time is now 8:05 a.m. No one answers on the first knock; so we knock again. No answer. We realize that we have forgotten to get a door tag from the truck to leave on the door letting the customer know we were there and what they can do about getting their package at a later time. Just as we turn to go back to the truck, a female voice calls out very loudly from behind the door.."WHO IS IT??!!"......"FedEx Ma'am...I have a delivery for you..." we exclaim back through the closed door. Suddenly, we hear the fumbling of the door locks and the door knob and we find ourselves face to face with a fairly attractive, fairly fit, and (shall we say it)...VERY WELL ENDOWED black woman wearing just her panties and a semi sheer button down top that was not even close to being buttoned. Definitely a Victoria's Secret/Fredericks of Hollywood Ensemble, if you will. (Fire Red and very lacy) She has opened the security door but not the outer door which is mostly plexiglass and aluminum. (Now comes the part where we are thankful for plexiglass....if only for a few minutes....)
She opens the outer door and slurrily asks..."What is it? What is it? Who sent it....What? What?"...and we are OVERWHELMED....hell....let's call it what it is....WE ARE ASSAULTED by her breathe! DEAR GOD!....The smell of last night's festivities were still raving in her mouth!.... We have evidently awoken the stale beer/hangover demon and it was not happy! To Hell with the Oklahoma National Guard, somebody call Tic-Tac USA and tell them we have a medical quarantine only they can handle! WOW! (as our eyes water....)
So we take a few steps back...(wanting to take many...ok...we want to FLEE! NOW! RIGHT NOW!) and say "I don't know Ma'am but could you sign here please?". She was a very nice person, don't get it wrong, but we have evidently gotten there WAAAAY TO EARLY for her! She is still very drunk and sleep hasn't really helped the situation...yet. She smiles pleasantly at us and reaches for the powerpad (the little computer we carry) to sign her name. She reaches out to take it from us and as she brings it back to her to sign, the semi sheer top she is wearing slips back on her shoulders and she is now BARE BREASTED in front of us and starts trying to sign her own name!! She is oblivious as to what has just now happened. WE HAVE GLORY! YES! WE HAVE GLORY!... In all its many faces....just makes you want to slap your hand over your eyes at this point for decency standards.....OK....awkward doesn't seem the right word here but get a hold of yourself...we have a job to do. Now... let's understand that we have awoken a drunk person who's inhibitions are a bit low at the moment and at this point, just glad to be standing. Sooooo....as she is trying to take time to FOCUS her eye sight on the place where she will sign her name, and swaying in place...(oh boy...(sigh..)) We then speak to her and say "Uhhh....Ma'am, you are exposed", at to which point, in slow motion mind you....(it really was slow motion)...she looks down, focuses again and then just shrugs. YES! She shrugs, and slowly pulls the two pieces of the top together. Just as flippantly as we would toss something in the trash. No fastening, not even an attempt. Just a flip of fabrics and it was over. Ok, if it doesn't bother her, it doesn't bother us...we have a job to do. We now notice that she is doing her best to focus on signing her name again. This will definitely be an accomplishment. Again, she is a very nice woman and has been courteous in every way(and in some ways, she might have taken it a bit to far) considering we awakened her and the stale beer demon party in her mouth up at 8 in the morning, but its amazing just how long it took to sign her name! The loops and turns of her signature were starting to look like Picasso's last days!! I think they signed the Declaration Of Independence in a shorter amount of time! (shaking our heads...). We now have our signature and we thank her. We also wish her a "Good Morning" and then secretly wish we could have also delivered Listerine! Wooooo...that was rough! Breast are Breasts and they are truly beautiful, but in this case, I definitely would have been more aroused and happier to see a bottle of Scope! (as the 70's porno music starts to filter into the background.....)
So now we have completed our first delivery of the day.....just 27 more to go and then its package pick up time....oh..just so you know...we got started with pickups a little early this morning....first, it was our jaw, then it was our humility. Thank goodness we don't work Saturdays any more!
Oh, don't go away.....we still have the adventure to the crack house or the snow bound masterbater....but that is for another blog... :)
Now, as most of you have read, or to those who know me personally; I am a FedEx courier. "The FedEx Guy"..in laymans terms. We, as a group, are usually running around your office, shipping/receiving, and are weaving and dodging you or your loved ones and friends in traffic with our trucks. We have the "opportunity" to go to places and meet people that some of you might be a little scared of........ at first. (they sometimes scare us too..LOL) We go into places that even the police are really nervous about trespassing into. We do it without fear (most of the time) because we have something the police never have....something for them.... a package! Something that they will want! LOL...We don't go get something unless we are called! LOL....
Our job introduces us to the most "perculiar" people....hmmm...feeling one of those moments again....this one involves beer and breasts....got your attention on that one didn't I?
Come ride with me for a while....buckle up cause its Saturday morning and we are delivering!
Its a chilly late October morning 2008, around 7: 45 a.m., and we have 28 packages to deliver before noon. We have around 14 square miles to cover in that time. Trust me, that is A LOT of miles! We have routed the packages by addresses and zip codes on our truck and our first stop is very close to the station. An apartment building very near the State capital buildings of Oklahoma. We have just left the station and it only takes us about 4 minutes to the stop. We grab the package (letter) and spring out the sliding door of our truck. We walk to the door and knock loudly. The time is now 8:05 a.m. No one answers on the first knock; so we knock again. No answer. We realize that we have forgotten to get a door tag from the truck to leave on the door letting the customer know we were there and what they can do about getting their package at a later time. Just as we turn to go back to the truck, a female voice calls out very loudly from behind the door.."WHO IS IT??!!"......"FedEx Ma'am...I have a delivery for you..." we exclaim back through the closed door. Suddenly, we hear the fumbling of the door locks and the door knob and we find ourselves face to face with a fairly attractive, fairly fit, and (shall we say it)...VERY WELL ENDOWED black woman wearing just her panties and a semi sheer button down top that was not even close to being buttoned. Definitely a Victoria's Secret/Fredericks of Hollywood Ensemble, if you will. (Fire Red and very lacy) She has opened the security door but not the outer door which is mostly plexiglass and aluminum. (Now comes the part where we are thankful for plexiglass....if only for a few minutes....)
She opens the outer door and slurrily asks..."What is it? What is it? Who sent it....What? What?"...and we are OVERWHELMED....hell....let's call it what it is....WE ARE ASSAULTED by her breathe! DEAR GOD!....The smell of last night's festivities were still raving in her mouth!.... We have evidently awoken the stale beer/hangover demon and it was not happy! To Hell with the Oklahoma National Guard, somebody call Tic-Tac USA and tell them we have a medical quarantine only they can handle! WOW! (as our eyes water....)
So we take a few steps back...(wanting to take many...ok...we want to FLEE! NOW! RIGHT NOW!) and say "I don't know Ma'am but could you sign here please?". She was a very nice person, don't get it wrong, but we have evidently gotten there WAAAAY TO EARLY for her! She is still very drunk and sleep hasn't really helped the situation...yet. She smiles pleasantly at us and reaches for the powerpad (the little computer we carry) to sign her name. She reaches out to take it from us and as she brings it back to her to sign, the semi sheer top she is wearing slips back on her shoulders and she is now BARE BREASTED in front of us and starts trying to sign her own name!! She is oblivious as to what has just now happened. WE HAVE GLORY! YES! WE HAVE GLORY!... In all its many faces....just makes you want to slap your hand over your eyes at this point for decency standards.....OK....awkward doesn't seem the right word here but get a hold of yourself...we have a job to do. Now... let's understand that we have awoken a drunk person who's inhibitions are a bit low at the moment and at this point, just glad to be standing. Sooooo....as she is trying to take time to FOCUS her eye sight on the place where she will sign her name, and swaying in place...(oh boy...(sigh..)) We then speak to her and say "Uhhh....Ma'am, you are exposed", at to which point, in slow motion mind you....(it really was slow motion)...she looks down, focuses again and then just shrugs. YES! She shrugs, and slowly pulls the two pieces of the top together. Just as flippantly as we would toss something in the trash. No fastening, not even an attempt. Just a flip of fabrics and it was over. Ok, if it doesn't bother her, it doesn't bother us...we have a job to do. We now notice that she is doing her best to focus on signing her name again. This will definitely be an accomplishment. Again, she is a very nice woman and has been courteous in every way(and in some ways, she might have taken it a bit to far) considering we awakened her and the stale beer demon party in her mouth up at 8 in the morning, but its amazing just how long it took to sign her name! The loops and turns of her signature were starting to look like Picasso's last days!! I think they signed the Declaration Of Independence in a shorter amount of time! (shaking our heads...). We now have our signature and we thank her. We also wish her a "Good Morning" and then secretly wish we could have also delivered Listerine! Wooooo...that was rough! Breast are Breasts and they are truly beautiful, but in this case, I definitely would have been more aroused and happier to see a bottle of Scope! (as the 70's porno music starts to filter into the background.....)
So now we have completed our first delivery of the day.....just 27 more to go and then its package pick up time....oh..just so you know...we got started with pickups a little early this morning....first, it was our jaw, then it was our humility. Thank goodness we don't work Saturdays any more!
Oh, don't go away.....we still have the adventure to the crack house or the snow bound masterbater....but that is for another blog... :)
29 Dimensions of BULLSHIT!!!
Current mood:amused
Ok, we've all heard and seen the Eharmony advertisements on T.V. or the radio. They used to guarantee to find you a mate due to their "patented 29 Dimensions of Compatibility" survey within a certain amount of time or your money back. ( I'm still giggling at that) Well, a couple of years ago, several women sued them for false advertisement and breach of contract because the site didn't fulfill its "promise" and refused to give them their money back, stating it was not anything EHarmony had done wrong and that they should have read the agreement closer. (Its all in the fine print my friends!) Now EHarmony settled the suit rather quickly, can't have bad press can we! Bad for business. Anyway a few months ago, before I learned of all this, I too, tried Eharmony, along with several other online "match" sites...
This is what I have discovered. The "29 Dimensions of Compatibility" is a survey that THEY are counting on YOU to be honest. Now, in itself, this might not seem like much, but think a bit closer. Now most sites just ask for the vitals and for you to write a few words about yourself and what you are looking for and then let you look around at other people. EHarmony charges you $49.99 to take half of the work away from you and sends you a few matches every other day or so and gives you the false idea that they are making it easier and safer for us all to find that special someone. The "29 Dimension of Compatibility" is nothing more than, shall I say it....BULLSHIT!
If you lie on the survey, you can be anybody you want to be. They don't do a background check on you, they don't really do anything, except give you the opportunity to make a choice.....be "29" different things you truly are or "29" different things you truly aren't. Are you getting the picture? and one more question for you to think about....do you think everyone on the internet will be honest, even through EHarmony? (humming the song "This will be....) Hmmmmmmmm.....
Ok, we've all heard and seen the Eharmony advertisements on T.V. or the radio. They used to guarantee to find you a mate due to their "patented 29 Dimensions of Compatibility" survey within a certain amount of time or your money back. ( I'm still giggling at that) Well, a couple of years ago, several women sued them for false advertisement and breach of contract because the site didn't fulfill its "promise" and refused to give them their money back, stating it was not anything EHarmony had done wrong and that they should have read the agreement closer. (Its all in the fine print my friends!) Now EHarmony settled the suit rather quickly, can't have bad press can we! Bad for business. Anyway a few months ago, before I learned of all this, I too, tried Eharmony, along with several other online "match" sites...
This is what I have discovered. The "29 Dimensions of Compatibility" is a survey that THEY are counting on YOU to be honest. Now, in itself, this might not seem like much, but think a bit closer. Now most sites just ask for the vitals and for you to write a few words about yourself and what you are looking for and then let you look around at other people. EHarmony charges you $49.99 to take half of the work away from you and sends you a few matches every other day or so and gives you the false idea that they are making it easier and safer for us all to find that special someone. The "29 Dimension of Compatibility" is nothing more than, shall I say it....BULLSHIT!
If you lie on the survey, you can be anybody you want to be. They don't do a background check on you, they don't really do anything, except give you the opportunity to make a choice.....be "29" different things you truly are or "29" different things you truly aren't. Are you getting the picture? and one more question for you to think about....do you think everyone on the internet will be honest, even through EHarmony? (humming the song "This will be....) Hmmmmmmmm.....
Going on a Date with a Woman with No Teeth
Current mood:indescribable
Now, for some of you that don't realize this, I used to work 3rd shift so I am up all night. I do quite a bit of surfing on the web and on Myspace because I had some down time that allowed for it and my boss didn't seem to mind. As you can guess, the "interesting" people do come out at night. Once you weed out the porno wannabes and the "hey do you want to see my webcam" crowd, you do get lucky on occasion and find a good friend! But for the most part, just when I think I've seen it all, somebody just seems to top it on Myspace with some crazy page or stupid comment! LMAO....kinda like going out on date with a woman with false teeth and she pops them out at you just for fun. Once you get past the shock factor, you realize you might want to reconsider just what condition was your value meter in when you decided to make.....contact.
Scotty, have you got that beam ready?
and to compound the point......
I've been on that date.....
Settle in, this will take a while.....
In August 2006, I met someone using another site. I thought she was attractive, we were close in age (not that that matters but it gives you a better picture), seemed to be intelligent, and definitely knew what to say. (Sound familiar to some of you?) Now I'm not the type of man who just jumps at or for an attractive woman at the first moment of meeting. I've been "tagged" more than I care to be on the "catch and release" program. (Some of you ladies, yes, you heard me, SOME, just don't know what to do with a good man...I do understand it though..not alot of experience with them and NO! You cannot have me stuffed and mounted to your wall!)
So after talking for a few weeks, I decided to pursue further. No harm. Everything seemed like it had possibilities. After a little bit more time, I asked her for a date. She sounded genuinely thrilled with the idea of meeting and accepted.
All is well.....
She lived about 75 miles from me, which is not really an issue for me....I'm used to traveling ALOT...so I made the drive. Anticipation is everything, we all know it well. We agreed to meet at an Outback Steakhouse for a few drinks and then would decide from there what to do. I was unfamiliar with the area so we'll just let things go where they go...Right? (Its getting eerie isn't it?...LOL..been there haven't you?...)
I walk in and step up to the bar and order a drink. I got there a little early, so I thought I would take a few minutes to relax the little bit of the nervousness I was feeling. We were to meet at around 7:30 p.m. Around 7:35, I recieved a phone call and it was her apologizing about be a little late. No big deal, she at least called, that was definitely kudos from me...she was courteous! She explained her story and I understood. These things happen. She told me she was on the way and would arrive in about 10 minutes. Great! Not a problem! I then asked if I could get her something from the bar and it would be waiting for her when she arrived. She then told me she would like that. She then told me what she liked and I took care of it. 10 minutes later, she arrived as she said, and we met, physically, for the first time. She was apologetic again, which I assured her was quite alright...nothing wrong with the occasional "fashionably late" entrance.
I will admit, she was attractive, but with me.... you better bring more than that. As we sat down and began talking more, I began to realize the power of the internet (and later, the power of alcohol).The more we spoke of life, the less intelligent she became (its amazing how fast some people can find things on the internet!). Look, I know I probably sound a bit arrogant, but you should at least be able to tell me who JFK was! ("He was a president wasn't he?".....you getting the picture now? and NO! she was not a blonde!) Anyway, I ordered us a few more drinks over the next hour. As we chit chatted some more, I was becoming so what amused (and honestly beginning to get a bit bored) and then from there the night started to head down hill quickly.
After genuinely trying to keep the conversation alive for a while, I could tell she wasn't keeping up with the conversation. She was laughing and giggling a bit to much. Now, I am witty and can be funny, but this was overdoing it a bit. I think "Tipsy" was slapping her in the back of the head with a shovel! Ok, Ok, I know...I shouldn't have ordered so many drinks (3 apiece at this point)....so I decided to order something to eat....stop the growth of this monster or at least slow it down. (Little did I know....), so I paid the tab at the bar and we moved to a booth and ordered some dinner. The waitress comes over, takes the order and then asks if she could freshen our drinks. My "date" then proceeds to tell the waitress she would like to order something a "bit" stronger. She was drinking Seabreezes when we first met.... she was drinking Long Island Ice Teas when I ended this "date". So now...... we have a conversation slowly going nowhere, a tipsy date who is increasingly getting closer to me, a Long Island Ice Tea on deck, I'm 75 miles from home and I don't have a clue where she lives or even how she's going to get back there herself.....might be bad? I don't know..... Time is now around 9:45 p.m.....
So the waitress comes back, (with the Long Island Iced Tea) and tells us dinner will be out shortly. We both smiled and I thanked the waitress. Once again, I turn to face her and ask a rather simple question, you know, a chit chat question, something to move the conversation along. At this point, I notice that her cheek is moving but her mouth isn't. Hmmmm...I think. Tongue must be going numb or something, who knows...I just fleetingly let it go. So now as she begins to talk, I glance over to my drink and reach for it and then she suddenly sounds like she's shoved a drink coaster in her mouth! I quickly peel my eyes back to her and she has this little painfully sheepish grin on her face but she still has her composure! :) So I take a sip of my drink (by now I had switched to tea and ordered her a Diet Coke) and wait for a second for her to speak, recover...whatever you want to call it. At this point she smiles and tells me she needs to go to the "ladies room"...I smile and acknowledge her..she then gets out of her seat and reaches for my hand and places hers on top of mine and smiles. This of course is a sign...DUH! Ok...how are we going to go from here?
So after 5 or 10 minutes, she comes back, smiling and talking and the evening moves forward. Little did I know, that on her way to the 'Ladies room", she had stopped our waitress and ordered another Long Island Iced Tea! It's Loopy TIME! WOO HOO! (You can stop laughing at me at anytime now)....So the waitress brings the drink. I just kinda relax and realize this date is now not going to be over anytime soon. Your in it now my friend, just buckle in and enjoy the ride!
So we talk a little more and I'm beginning to run out of things to talk about that she and I might be able to relate to. The flood of alcohol and the lack of use of the internet were starting to take its toll on the 'lovely' woman and her inhibitions were quickly melting away. I made a light joke about living in a small town; not a mean comment but just a little needling jibe and she almost roared with laughter! At that very moment when she laughed, the entire upper part of her jaw released and her teeth were about to fall out of her mouth. (Stop laughing...) It was everything I could do to not be embarrassed for her and also to keep from starting to giggle a little. She slaps her hand over her mouth in a split second and has that mortified look on her face (you know the one). I then just calmly looked at her and said "I take it you have false teeth" (nothing witty at that moment, the embarrassment factor was registering "suicide alert"). I really wasn't aware that she had false teeth at any point until then and it wouldn't have made a difference one way or the other. These things happen, she could have been in a car wreck, an ex could have beaten her up, she could have had a skateboard accident, I don't know..not for me to judge. Anyway.....
So now.....(BIG SIGH).. I have a dead conversation, a DRUNK embarrassed date, a loose set of false teeth, a full Long Island Iced Tea on the table, I'm 75 miles from home, and I still haven't figured out how this woman is getting to her house.....I wasn't about to let her drive.
I'M THINKING ABOUT DRINKING THE LONG ISLAND ICED TEA at this point...(and I hate them)
Evidently.... when she left home, the teeth were firmly in place, but at some place in the evening, they were irritating her gums, plus adding the drunkeness and what might have been considered a little apprehension/nervousness, she started fooling with them with her tongue! and she left the adhesive at home! So I realized she was frighteningly embarrassed and I did all I could to lower the excitement level. After about 10 minutes, everything was calming down, and she relaxed and then the alcohol kicked in right about that time....(Do you know what the drunk prayer is? I was thinking of using it at that point)
So she explained that she had been in a car accident and that most of her upper teeth had been wiped out after "eating" the steering wheel. See...easy explanation! (Plastic surgeon did a fanstastic job! I'll have to say, I didn't see a scar or damage to her face at all) So now she was starting to feel even more relaxed with talking to me because this "secret" was out in the open and I didn't make an issue of it. No problem, just need to work on the informed conversationalist problem now. So, we talk further, I laugh with her about a few jokes she had made and she was really trying to turn on the charm now. At this point, I think she was really feeling the "Tea" because she began to make jokes about a few of her relatives concerning just how dumb they were (all the while gulping the Long Island Iced Tea). To make this point to me, she made a joke about a cousin or sister or someone and POPPED her teeth halfway out of her mouth at me to illustrate! Ok....so now she has let me know that her family is dumb and toothless! (Would you stop laughing?....Stop!...) I don't care what you say, if anybody ever pops their teeth out at you for fun and you don't know them really personally, its time to go...(you people think I'm making this up...this really happened! You can't make this up!)
So after a few more minutes, I then, politely, flagged the waitress over to the table, asked for the check and the next thing I hear is "Are you ready to go? Where do you want to go next?" The time is now 11:45 p.m......(Uh oh...)
Of course, I very politely excused myself by telling her I had to go home, lots of stuff to do tomorrow and gotta get up early. (you know the excuse). I then asked her if she had some friends she could call to come pick her up or if I could give her a ride to her house. I insisted she not try to drive home. She then said she was alright, but I knew better. I tried for several minutes to talk her out of it but she insisted. (Ever tried to argue with a very tipsy person? Uh huh..you know how the conversation goes.....) I then asked her to at least wait a few minutes before she left and try to get her bearings. She promised me she would (Yeah..right). So I gave her a hug, a kiss on the cheek (I got the feeling she wanted a better kiss...lets not go there shall we?) and thanked her for the "great time" and drove myself home.
(Whispering softly) I see false teeth!
(For those that want to know...we only spoke a few more times after that night....her choice :) )
Now, for some of you that don't realize this, I used to work 3rd shift so I am up all night. I do quite a bit of surfing on the web and on Myspace because I had some down time that allowed for it and my boss didn't seem to mind. As you can guess, the "interesting" people do come out at night. Once you weed out the porno wannabes and the "hey do you want to see my webcam" crowd, you do get lucky on occasion and find a good friend! But for the most part, just when I think I've seen it all, somebody just seems to top it on Myspace with some crazy page or stupid comment! LMAO....kinda like going out on date with a woman with false teeth and she pops them out at you just for fun. Once you get past the shock factor, you realize you might want to reconsider just what condition was your value meter in when you decided to make.....contact.
Scotty, have you got that beam ready?
and to compound the point......
I've been on that date.....
Settle in, this will take a while.....
In August 2006, I met someone using another site. I thought she was attractive, we were close in age (not that that matters but it gives you a better picture), seemed to be intelligent, and definitely knew what to say. (Sound familiar to some of you?) Now I'm not the type of man who just jumps at or for an attractive woman at the first moment of meeting. I've been "tagged" more than I care to be on the "catch and release" program. (Some of you ladies, yes, you heard me, SOME, just don't know what to do with a good man...I do understand it though..not alot of experience with them and NO! You cannot have me stuffed and mounted to your wall!)
So after talking for a few weeks, I decided to pursue further. No harm. Everything seemed like it had possibilities. After a little bit more time, I asked her for a date. She sounded genuinely thrilled with the idea of meeting and accepted.
All is well.....
She lived about 75 miles from me, which is not really an issue for me....I'm used to traveling ALOT...so I made the drive. Anticipation is everything, we all know it well. We agreed to meet at an Outback Steakhouse for a few drinks and then would decide from there what to do. I was unfamiliar with the area so we'll just let things go where they go...Right? (Its getting eerie isn't it?...LOL..been there haven't you?...)
I walk in and step up to the bar and order a drink. I got there a little early, so I thought I would take a few minutes to relax the little bit of the nervousness I was feeling. We were to meet at around 7:30 p.m. Around 7:35, I recieved a phone call and it was her apologizing about be a little late. No big deal, she at least called, that was definitely kudos from me...she was courteous! She explained her story and I understood. These things happen. She told me she was on the way and would arrive in about 10 minutes. Great! Not a problem! I then asked if I could get her something from the bar and it would be waiting for her when she arrived. She then told me she would like that. She then told me what she liked and I took care of it. 10 minutes later, she arrived as she said, and we met, physically, for the first time. She was apologetic again, which I assured her was quite alright...nothing wrong with the occasional "fashionably late" entrance.
I will admit, she was attractive, but with me.... you better bring more than that. As we sat down and began talking more, I began to realize the power of the internet (and later, the power of alcohol).The more we spoke of life, the less intelligent she became (its amazing how fast some people can find things on the internet!). Look, I know I probably sound a bit arrogant, but you should at least be able to tell me who JFK was! ("He was a president wasn't he?".....you getting the picture now? and NO! she was not a blonde!) Anyway, I ordered us a few more drinks over the next hour. As we chit chatted some more, I was becoming so what amused (and honestly beginning to get a bit bored) and then from there the night started to head down hill quickly.
After genuinely trying to keep the conversation alive for a while, I could tell she wasn't keeping up with the conversation. She was laughing and giggling a bit to much. Now, I am witty and can be funny, but this was overdoing it a bit. I think "Tipsy" was slapping her in the back of the head with a shovel! Ok, Ok, I know...I shouldn't have ordered so many drinks (3 apiece at this point)....so I decided to order something to eat....stop the growth of this monster or at least slow it down. (Little did I know....), so I paid the tab at the bar and we moved to a booth and ordered some dinner. The waitress comes over, takes the order and then asks if she could freshen our drinks. My "date" then proceeds to tell the waitress she would like to order something a "bit" stronger. She was drinking Seabreezes when we first met.... she was drinking Long Island Ice Teas when I ended this "date". So now...... we have a conversation slowly going nowhere, a tipsy date who is increasingly getting closer to me, a Long Island Ice Tea on deck, I'm 75 miles from home and I don't have a clue where she lives or even how she's going to get back there herself.....might be bad? I don't know..... Time is now around 9:45 p.m.....
So the waitress comes back, (with the Long Island Iced Tea) and tells us dinner will be out shortly. We both smiled and I thanked the waitress. Once again, I turn to face her and ask a rather simple question, you know, a chit chat question, something to move the conversation along. At this point, I notice that her cheek is moving but her mouth isn't. Hmmmm...I think. Tongue must be going numb or something, who knows...I just fleetingly let it go. So now as she begins to talk, I glance over to my drink and reach for it and then she suddenly sounds like she's shoved a drink coaster in her mouth! I quickly peel my eyes back to her and she has this little painfully sheepish grin on her face but she still has her composure! :) So I take a sip of my drink (by now I had switched to tea and ordered her a Diet Coke) and wait for a second for her to speak, recover...whatever you want to call it. At this point she smiles and tells me she needs to go to the "ladies room"...I smile and acknowledge her..she then gets out of her seat and reaches for my hand and places hers on top of mine and smiles. This of course is a sign...DUH! Ok...how are we going to go from here?
So after 5 or 10 minutes, she comes back, smiling and talking and the evening moves forward. Little did I know, that on her way to the 'Ladies room", she had stopped our waitress and ordered another Long Island Iced Tea! It's Loopy TIME! WOO HOO! (You can stop laughing at me at anytime now)....So the waitress brings the drink. I just kinda relax and realize this date is now not going to be over anytime soon. Your in it now my friend, just buckle in and enjoy the ride!
So we talk a little more and I'm beginning to run out of things to talk about that she and I might be able to relate to. The flood of alcohol and the lack of use of the internet were starting to take its toll on the 'lovely' woman and her inhibitions were quickly melting away. I made a light joke about living in a small town; not a mean comment but just a little needling jibe and she almost roared with laughter! At that very moment when she laughed, the entire upper part of her jaw released and her teeth were about to fall out of her mouth. (Stop laughing...) It was everything I could do to not be embarrassed for her and also to keep from starting to giggle a little. She slaps her hand over her mouth in a split second and has that mortified look on her face (you know the one). I then just calmly looked at her and said "I take it you have false teeth" (nothing witty at that moment, the embarrassment factor was registering "suicide alert"). I really wasn't aware that she had false teeth at any point until then and it wouldn't have made a difference one way or the other. These things happen, she could have been in a car wreck, an ex could have beaten her up, she could have had a skateboard accident, I don't know..not for me to judge. Anyway.....
So now.....(BIG SIGH).. I have a dead conversation, a DRUNK embarrassed date, a loose set of false teeth, a full Long Island Iced Tea on the table, I'm 75 miles from home, and I still haven't figured out how this woman is getting to her house.....I wasn't about to let her drive.
I'M THINKING ABOUT DRINKING THE LONG ISLAND ICED TEA at this point...(and I hate them)
Evidently.... when she left home, the teeth were firmly in place, but at some place in the evening, they were irritating her gums, plus adding the drunkeness and what might have been considered a little apprehension/nervousness, she started fooling with them with her tongue! and she left the adhesive at home! So I realized she was frighteningly embarrassed and I did all I could to lower the excitement level. After about 10 minutes, everything was calming down, and she relaxed and then the alcohol kicked in right about that time....(Do you know what the drunk prayer is? I was thinking of using it at that point)
So she explained that she had been in a car accident and that most of her upper teeth had been wiped out after "eating" the steering wheel. See...easy explanation! (Plastic surgeon did a fanstastic job! I'll have to say, I didn't see a scar or damage to her face at all) So now she was starting to feel even more relaxed with talking to me because this "secret" was out in the open and I didn't make an issue of it. No problem, just need to work on the informed conversationalist problem now. So, we talk further, I laugh with her about a few jokes she had made and she was really trying to turn on the charm now. At this point, I think she was really feeling the "Tea" because she began to make jokes about a few of her relatives concerning just how dumb they were (all the while gulping the Long Island Iced Tea). To make this point to me, she made a joke about a cousin or sister or someone and POPPED her teeth halfway out of her mouth at me to illustrate! Ok....so now she has let me know that her family is dumb and toothless! (Would you stop laughing?....Stop!...) I don't care what you say, if anybody ever pops their teeth out at you for fun and you don't know them really personally, its time to go...(you people think I'm making this up...this really happened! You can't make this up!)
So after a few more minutes, I then, politely, flagged the waitress over to the table, asked for the check and the next thing I hear is "Are you ready to go? Where do you want to go next?" The time is now 11:45 p.m......(Uh oh...)
Of course, I very politely excused myself by telling her I had to go home, lots of stuff to do tomorrow and gotta get up early. (you know the excuse). I then asked her if she had some friends she could call to come pick her up or if I could give her a ride to her house. I insisted she not try to drive home. She then said she was alright, but I knew better. I tried for several minutes to talk her out of it but she insisted. (Ever tried to argue with a very tipsy person? Uh huh..you know how the conversation goes.....) I then asked her to at least wait a few minutes before she left and try to get her bearings. She promised me she would (Yeah..right). So I gave her a hug, a kiss on the cheek (I got the feeling she wanted a better kiss...lets not go there shall we?) and thanked her for the "great time" and drove myself home.
(Whispering softly) I see false teeth!
(For those that want to know...we only spoke a few more times after that night....her choice :) )
Objet Petit-A
Current mood:quixotic
AS Valentine's Day passes us once again, I can't help but to reflect on what seems to be a common theme for the most part on Myspace. The strive for the "objet petit a". Now, "objet petit a" (object little-a) stands for the unattainable object of Desire. It is sometimes called the object cause of desire. This was first put forth by a French Psychoanalyst named Jacques Lacan in the 1960's.
We've been there, we've chased it, tried to become the center focus of it (hence so many half naked people on this site "LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME!..LMAO..gotta credit those people), We've run as hard as we possibly can after it....physically, emotionally, or intellectually, but it always stays one step ahead. In layman's terms, it is the driving force for us to continue to move forward with seeking out our fantasies and dreams, to seek to be loved unconditionally and to love someone that way in return. Here, let me help you understand it better by using a few lines from the film "The Life of David Gale":
The Scene:
Thirty animated students (circa 1992) are listening to David lecture. On the white board behind him are phrases: "Lucan," "objet petit a," "Fantasy Theory."
DAVID: Think. What do you fantasize about?
DAVID: World peace? (as no one responds)
DAVID: Thought so. (light laughter)
DAVID: Money-Fame-Ferrari? (as some guys applaud loudly; others then boo them) A Pulitzer? Nobel? M.T.V. Music Award? (applause) A genius hunk -- ostensibly bad but secretly simmering with noble passions, and willing to sleep on the wet spot?
(most of the women laugh)
DAVID: A Victoria's Secret model -- just slumming between law school and running her family's Vastly Endowed Foundation for Tragically Sad-Eyed Children?
(The crowd laughs,)
(David changes tone.)
DAVID: Okay, good, you see Lucan's point. Fantasies must be unrealistic. The minute you get something, you don't, you can't, want it anymore. To exist, desire needs absent objects. So desire supports itself with crazy fantasies...
DAVID: Or why we say, 'The hunt is sweeter than the kill' or 'Be careful what you wish for.
DAVID: Not because you'll get it, but because you're doomed not to want it if you do get it. Think about it next time you're at a wedding.
On that day, we take the time to celebrate the "love" we think we have found, for some, its the celebration of the idea that someone, somewhere out there loves us (they just don't know it yet); so romantically and so deeply that time itself would stand still if we truly found each other. A stitch in time.
The problem is that alot of people have taken their "objet petit a" for granted, changed it's focus ignorantly, lost sight of it all together, or focused it like a laser beam on someone who really just wants something far more different than they do. You know these people; They only really celebrate once a year to stay out of the proverbial "doghouse". They are the most likely to wince in pain and wallow in self pity when it is forcibly realized what they once had in their life has been lost. It is at that point they want to strive for it again. They're are no guaranteed and warranted second chances.
Love is not a "objet petit a"...it is attainable. Its the levels to which YOU are willing to reach in your life that can make YOU strive; that will show you your "objet petit a" again in your life...whether it's him/her giving up on you, or you giving up on him/her.....have YOU bothered to notice that YOU still have "desires"? and if you are in that place where no one is in your life to love romantically, have you bothered to look at your own "objet petit a"? Just what shape is it in?
Just a thought...
To quote my friend Isabella:
"There's a stunning diversity among REAL men, something, no list, no book, no guru, no philosopher, no psychologist could hope to delineate and the women, who announce they want and need a REAL man, need to be searching themselves to determine if they are, infact, deserving of one."
"Definition of a Real Man" Blog
Posted Saturday, October 28, 2006
Her subject is specific but the broad premise is the same.....finding a "real man" (or a real woman) seems to be unattainable as I read so many peoples' pages. Is it your "objet petit a" and just how much are you contributing to strive away from it or for it?
Happy Valentine's Day to all! and Happy Singles Appreciation Day to the rest of us! LOL..
AS Valentine's Day passes us once again, I can't help but to reflect on what seems to be a common theme for the most part on Myspace. The strive for the "objet petit a". Now, "objet petit a" (object little-a) stands for the unattainable object of Desire. It is sometimes called the object cause of desire. This was first put forth by a French Psychoanalyst named Jacques Lacan in the 1960's.
We've been there, we've chased it, tried to become the center focus of it (hence so many half naked people on this site "LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME!..LMAO..gotta credit those people), We've run as hard as we possibly can after it....physically, emotionally, or intellectually, but it always stays one step ahead. In layman's terms, it is the driving force for us to continue to move forward with seeking out our fantasies and dreams, to seek to be loved unconditionally and to love someone that way in return. Here, let me help you understand it better by using a few lines from the film "The Life of David Gale":
The Scene:
Thirty animated students (circa 1992) are listening to David lecture. On the white board behind him are phrases: "Lucan," "objet petit a," "Fantasy Theory."
DAVID: Think. What do you fantasize about?
DAVID: World peace? (as no one responds)
DAVID: Thought so. (light laughter)
DAVID: Money-Fame-Ferrari? (as some guys applaud loudly; others then boo them) A Pulitzer? Nobel? M.T.V. Music Award? (applause) A genius hunk -- ostensibly bad but secretly simmering with noble passions, and willing to sleep on the wet spot?
(most of the women laugh)
DAVID: A Victoria's Secret model -- just slumming between law school and running her family's Vastly Endowed Foundation for Tragically Sad-Eyed Children?
(The crowd laughs,)
(David changes tone.)
DAVID: Okay, good, you see Lucan's point. Fantasies must be unrealistic. The minute you get something, you don't, you can't, want it anymore. To exist, desire needs absent objects. So desire supports itself with crazy fantasies...
DAVID: Or why we say, 'The hunt is sweeter than the kill' or 'Be careful what you wish for.
DAVID: Not because you'll get it, but because you're doomed not to want it if you do get it. Think about it next time you're at a wedding.
On that day, we take the time to celebrate the "love" we think we have found, for some, its the celebration of the idea that someone, somewhere out there loves us (they just don't know it yet); so romantically and so deeply that time itself would stand still if we truly found each other. A stitch in time.
The problem is that alot of people have taken their "objet petit a" for granted, changed it's focus ignorantly, lost sight of it all together, or focused it like a laser beam on someone who really just wants something far more different than they do. You know these people; They only really celebrate once a year to stay out of the proverbial "doghouse". They are the most likely to wince in pain and wallow in self pity when it is forcibly realized what they once had in their life has been lost. It is at that point they want to strive for it again. They're are no guaranteed and warranted second chances.
Love is not a "objet petit a"...it is attainable. Its the levels to which YOU are willing to reach in your life that can make YOU strive; that will show you your "objet petit a" again in your life...whether it's him/her giving up on you, or you giving up on him/her.....have YOU bothered to notice that YOU still have "desires"? and if you are in that place where no one is in your life to love romantically, have you bothered to look at your own "objet petit a"? Just what shape is it in?
Just a thought...
To quote my friend Isabella:
"There's a stunning diversity among REAL men, something, no list, no book, no guru, no philosopher, no psychologist could hope to delineate and the women, who announce they want and need a REAL man, need to be searching themselves to determine if they are, infact, deserving of one."
"Definition of a Real Man" Blog
Posted Saturday, October 28, 2006
Her subject is specific but the broad premise is the same.....finding a "real man" (or a real woman) seems to be unattainable as I read so many peoples' pages. Is it your "objet petit a" and just how much are you contributing to strive away from it or for it?
Happy Valentine's Day to all! and Happy Singles Appreciation Day to the rest of us! LOL..
Saturday, September 17, 2011
I am Yours
Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were, but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today
Life takes its moments to present its ironies and slap you. Those closest to me know my past between my Dad and me. We have catastrophies that have lead to great riffs. At times, I truly claim that they are my cause. I was obstinant, strong-willed and down right , obscene. I challenged, I was destructive, I was disrespectful, and I was cruel. I followed the leader. Its all I knew. Its not enough justification.I Am Yours.
Ooh, ooh
I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
I took all that you dished out and returned it with just as much passion. You fumbled your way through fatherhood just as I do now. You showed loved as you were taught. I fumbled my way of learning your way and swore that I would break the cycle. You broke it for me. I now follow your lead.......as you now see what could have been. You stepped forward, and I see it, I welcome it, I have been waiting patiently for it. I am so proud to be a part of it. I am so happy to share it with you.
I am Yours.
Sometimes I wanna call ya
But I know you won't be there
Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
You gave me a gift I can never repay. You called me your own. You gave me your name. You gave me a family that I hold so dear. You loved when it was needed....you cared when it meant the most....and always tried to do the best....but never were able to express it in terms this boy....now a man...could understand then, but does now.
I am Yours.
Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just wanna hide 'cause it's you I miss
And it's so hard to say goodbye
When it comes to this, oooh yeah
So many times I have screamed you will die a lonely old man, so may times I screamed you are a bastard, so many times I have screamed that you care about nothing but yourself.....so many time I have been blind. So many times....I have been wrong. So many times I never looked, or at times, wanted to...... I never tried. I only looked at me and never really tried to look....I am looking now and what I see holds me humbled. Thank you. Truly......
I am Yours.
Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes
And see you looking back
We both squandered chances to know each other, we both stubbornly refused to move. We both faced off in anger and jealousy and also in love and in experiences. The one thing we never did was respect each other....until now....one needed to see something from the other....not sure who flinched first....the hope we had in each other is fulfilling.
I am Yours.
Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself, ohh
To listen to your excitement as to how my life is moving forward is a great moment. It is strange to me. You never took to much interest in my youth, as I felt it. You never seemed excited but then that is not a reason to hold a grudge on my end. The Woman you married and her Father gave me something that could help build a bridge to each other for us. The woman who gave to birth to you was very instrumental in building me as well. Your father was your father, he was something else to me. He loved you, and on his deathbed, he told me to mend our riff....he knew his place, he knew his cause, but he knew you loved me....he knew his deeds were wrong but he knew his son...and didn't want you to repeat his mistakes with me...you didn't...He had a really hard time excepting me as his grandson....he apologized to me at that time, but I never understood why he was apologizing to me...until that day you both told me the truth....he didn't want you to have to do that too....I never want to have you say your sorry. Ever....
I am Yours.
If I had just one more day
I would tell you how much that I've missed you
Since you've been away
Ooh, it's dangerous
It's so out of line
To try and turn back time
As our lives move forward, I want you to know that time is not infinite. We both have limited time ahead.....we both wasted so much time with pride, with arrogance, with immaturity on both side. I never want to wasted that time again. It was easier to ignore and fight than to come together....even you know that....one person's will is not the best answer for the other.
It never will be.
I am Yours.
I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
I am so thankful for the time we have now. I know that we will not always agree, and it will get heated. That is the parent/child relationship...but I am counting on this new found respect we have forged. It is astounding and reinvigorarted me with so much hope. You are overbearing but I am overresponsive. Its the irresistable force that meets the immovable object. Which one is which is the question. No matter what has ever been said or done...I always Loved you....and still do.
I am Yours.
Always have been, always will be.
I love you Dad!
Sincerely,
Son
You told me how proud you were, but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today
Life takes its moments to present its ironies and slap you. Those closest to me know my past between my Dad and me. We have catastrophies that have lead to great riffs. At times, I truly claim that they are my cause. I was obstinant, strong-willed and down right , obscene. I challenged, I was destructive, I was disrespectful, and I was cruel. I followed the leader. Its all I knew. Its not enough justification.I Am Yours.
Ooh, ooh
I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
I took all that you dished out and returned it with just as much passion. You fumbled your way through fatherhood just as I do now. You showed loved as you were taught. I fumbled my way of learning your way and swore that I would break the cycle. You broke it for me. I now follow your lead.......as you now see what could have been. You stepped forward, and I see it, I welcome it, I have been waiting patiently for it. I am so proud to be a part of it. I am so happy to share it with you.
I am Yours.
Sometimes I wanna call ya
But I know you won't be there
Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
You gave me a gift I can never repay. You called me your own. You gave me your name. You gave me a family that I hold so dear. You loved when it was needed....you cared when it meant the most....and always tried to do the best....but never were able to express it in terms this boy....now a man...could understand then, but does now.
I am Yours.
Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just wanna hide 'cause it's you I miss
And it's so hard to say goodbye
When it comes to this, oooh yeah
So many times I have screamed you will die a lonely old man, so may times I screamed you are a bastard, so many times I have screamed that you care about nothing but yourself.....so many time I have been blind. So many times....I have been wrong. So many times I never looked, or at times, wanted to...... I never tried. I only looked at me and never really tried to look....I am looking now and what I see holds me humbled. Thank you. Truly......
I am Yours.
Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes
And see you looking back
We both squandered chances to know each other, we both stubbornly refused to move. We both faced off in anger and jealousy and also in love and in experiences. The one thing we never did was respect each other....until now....one needed to see something from the other....not sure who flinched first....the hope we had in each other is fulfilling.
I am Yours.
Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself, ohh
To listen to your excitement as to how my life is moving forward is a great moment. It is strange to me. You never took to much interest in my youth, as I felt it. You never seemed excited but then that is not a reason to hold a grudge on my end. The Woman you married and her Father gave me something that could help build a bridge to each other for us. The woman who gave to birth to you was very instrumental in building me as well. Your father was your father, he was something else to me. He loved you, and on his deathbed, he told me to mend our riff....he knew his place, he knew his cause, but he knew you loved me....he knew his deeds were wrong but he knew his son...and didn't want you to repeat his mistakes with me...you didn't...He had a really hard time excepting me as his grandson....he apologized to me at that time, but I never understood why he was apologizing to me...until that day you both told me the truth....he didn't want you to have to do that too....I never want to have you say your sorry. Ever....
I am Yours.
If I had just one more day
I would tell you how much that I've missed you
Since you've been away
Ooh, it's dangerous
It's so out of line
To try and turn back time
As our lives move forward, I want you to know that time is not infinite. We both have limited time ahead.....we both wasted so much time with pride, with arrogance, with immaturity on both side. I never want to wasted that time again. It was easier to ignore and fight than to come together....even you know that....one person's will is not the best answer for the other.
It never will be.
I am Yours.
I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
I am so thankful for the time we have now. I know that we will not always agree, and it will get heated. That is the parent/child relationship...but I am counting on this new found respect we have forged. It is astounding and reinvigorarted me with so much hope. You are overbearing but I am overresponsive. Its the irresistable force that meets the immovable object. Which one is which is the question. No matter what has ever been said or done...I always Loved you....and still do.
I am Yours.
Always have been, always will be.
I love you Dad!
Sincerely,
Son
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